There and Back Again

We're Moving. . .

2011-05-13T13:01:00.000-07:00

to another blog site.

One that gives us a little more anonymity yet allows us to stay public. Same ol' blog with a new address.

Follow us to: http://amiandsmeems.blogspot.com/

Especially if you want to see more of this adorable mug.

Background on new blog name:
My mission companion Wheeler used to call me Ami (pronounced Ah-me) - based on my maiden name and the name kinda stuck. Lance's friends used to call him Smeems in high school.

I will eventually be deleting this site once people have realized we have moved. So make sure you bookmark our new address and become a follower of our new blog. We will see you there!

The Top Five

2011-03-26T10:23:00.000-07:00

The top five things we have observed about our Little Man now that he is five plus months old:

1. He frequently sucks in his lower lip and puffs out his cheeks like a chipmunk.

Carsten with his chipmunk impression.

2. He is so incredibly laid back. He rolled from his back to his front and his front to his back when he was four months old and has only done it once or twice more since. He is strong enough to do it. It is almost as though he is saying to me "Meh. I am fine where I am mom. No pressure, please."

Wearing Ellie Bear's glasses the same way she wears them.

3. He wakes up and sings to his doggy mobile. Sometimes he is awake for a hour before we even realize it.

Watching early morning cartoons with the cousins who came to visit.

4. He L-O-V-E-S our dog. More than any member in our family (much to his mother's chagrin.) He flaps his little arms and legs and squeals with delight when that mangy mutt comes near him. Sofi apparently senses this love as she has started to sleep in his room during the night and takes her morning nap with him next to his crib.

Sofi snoozing next to her buddy. Not the best picture but you get the picture.

5. He is still the easiest, sweetest baby that ever walked the planet. This kid is going to get whatever he wants - because his Mama can NOT resist his blue eyes, sweet laugh and cuddles. Help me Rhonda!

The picture that causes my uterus want a dozen more of these.

A Running Fool

2011-03-24T23:06:00.000-07:00

I used to think anyone who enjoyed running was a crazy fool. Why would anyone want to engage in such a monotonous sport that was so hard on your knees and feet and was basically torture? Besides, I am flat-footed with shorter than average Achilles's tendons. My body isn't 100% suited for running - or at least that is my cop-out for saying I am really an exercise wuss.

Then my SIL talked me into preparing to run a 5K with her. I thought - why not? I could add it to my "bucket list" of 2011.

I reluctantly started to run. (Or I should say slog.) Sometimes I hated it. Occasionally I found it enjoyable. More often than not I tolerated it I was never ever able to make the whole 5K distance without walking.

Me AFTER my first race. I am one HOT specimen of health, don't you think?

And then the day of the 5K arrived. I thought of every excuse of how I could get out of it, especially since it meant I had to get up at 5:00 a.m. But I went and RAN all 3.6 miles of my first race without stopping once. The sense of accomplishment along with the adrenaline rush of running with others in a race has become addicting.

So I am adding "jogging" to my list of interests as I prepare for my next 5K. I love when we sometimes surprise ourselves in life!

Thanks, Vickdid. You are the sister I never had and I will either sing your praises or curse you as I continue to pound the pavement with my double stroller and beagle in tow. Let's meet up in 2012 at some exotic location so we can run a 10K and then party it up with just us girls.

Vicki and I before the race.

Living the Dream - An Announcement

2011-03-15T12:12:00.000-07:00

In response to the polite phone conversation starter "So what are you up to?" my friend Amber, a busy SAHM with four beyond-cute kids who are active in (you name it), who also is in charge of primary(our ward's children's ministry) and does (who knows what else), replied "You know - living the dream." And even though we laughed, I really think she means it.

This is something that has been on my mind lately. Living the dream. What is my dream? I am a mother of two who is constantly TOO busy with a husband who also works hard. I do contract instructional design work and get paid a not-at-all-too-shabby amount to do it. I can set my hours, can work from home and do what I enjoy. Perfect job, right? And we don't even have to pay childcare because I watch my friend's little boy twice a week and she watches my kids twice a week.

Yet I am unable to give 100% to anything. And that frustrates me. I have wrestled with what to do about this for a few months.

Thus, I have decided to stop working and just be a stay at home mom for the time being once I finish out my contracts. Maybe someday when my kids are older and the perfect job opportunity arises, I will reconsider. But right now, they need their Mama at home and my husband needs someone to support him at this time in his life like he supported me while I went through school. And, as much as I do not LOVE doing domestic chores, they have to get done, and there is something that can be said when a house has order and my baby doesn't have to live with dog hair in his diaper. I worked way too hard to get my babies here in our family to not be there for as much of their lives as I can and provide a home for them that gives them a place to thrive.

Besides, I want to have the time to do the other things that matter most to me - like helping others who need help, serving the Primary kids at church, attending the temple on a regular basis, staying in touch with my family, spending time with my friends, writing to my blog, scrapbooking, smocking, running, cooking healthy meals, etc.

I am grateful I earned my Master's and had the opportunity to work for the many years I did. It was the right decision at the time. Now, this is the right time to scale back and hunker down in my nest and take care of my baby birds.

My friend Becky says to me quite often that "You can have it all, just not all right now." And something about that saying solidifies the peaceful assurance that I am making the right decision.

Sweet Sixteen

2011-02-28T14:22:00.000-08:00

Dear Carsten,

The bane of being the second child. While your sister had posts on her growth almost immediately after her monthly milestones, yours are always a month or so late. But, rest assured we don't love you any less. In fact, I can't imagine loving a baby even more than I love you. Here you are at 16 weeks donning the same flirtatious smile that melts my heart every day.

16 weeks is such a sweet age for you. Here is how you spend your days: belly laughing, chatting in baby talk, screeching at your toys, searching with a smile for your sister when you hear her voice, napping three times a day, falling asleep on your own in your own crib, sleeping through the night (started at 12 weeks or so), snuggling, sucking your thumb, drooling all over, and just relaxing.

Lest you try to rub it into your sister's face on how you were perfect, there is one thing that makes you furious with me - tummy time. You hate it. And loathe me for forcing you to do it daily. I never thought a baby could tell a parent off. But you have done it.

I am not sure what I did to deserve such a well-mannered, mild, happy baby but I am running with it.

Your stats:

Weight: 14 lbs 14 oz (50th percentile)

Height: 26 1/2 inches (95th percentile)

Still my long and semi-lean green bean. Love you little man!

Mama

One Word Valentines

2011-02-14T22:00:00.000-08:00

We hosted a dinner party with two other couples in which one of the attendees had these really interesting conversation prompts: Such as "Besides your wife and kids, of what are you most proud?" and "If you could describe your spouse with one word what would it be?" I thought the latter was very clever. So here is one word descriptions of my Valentines this year.

My Valentine #1: Lover

This boy is a lover and probably the most amiable and easy baby that has ever roamed the earth. We say every day, multiple times "I love this baby." He is so easy to love.
He already likes to flirt with grown women. And I am already jealous. Heaven help me for when he
eventually marries. Because I love being the woman in his life.

My Valentine #2: Determined

Is this happy, animated, friendly, kind, beautiful, emotional girl ever determined. She is chattering and on the move from the moment she wakes up to the moment she crashes for nap. When she sets her mind to something she doesn't give up. She's full of life and spunky. And just like her Mama.
Start praying for us now that we survive the teenage years.

Valentine #3: Genuine

This man has no pretense, always sees the good in others, loves to relax, is accepting of others,
and has a wicked sense of humor. He is so good that sometimes I pick fights to try to get him to get mad and make me feel better about my faults. Not surprisingly, he rarely is ruffled by this goading. He does everything he can to make me happy and is desperately trying to teach me the art of Zen. Keep hoping he doesn't wake up one day and ask himself "Why am I married to this crazy lady again??" He's the glue that holds us together and his son takes after him.

On a lighter note

2011-01-31T22:54:00.000-08:00

Streaming Netflix through my new birthday present has become a guilty pleasure for me the nights Lance works late. I get to watch movies like this without Lance here to tell me that:
A. The movie was something only teenagers would enjoy; or
B. The Rotten Tomatoes rating was -20% ; or
C. It was the worst movie ever made.

Lance walked in the midst of this newest Miley Cyrus movie to see this:

Our conversation went something like this:

Lance: What are you watching?
Kristi: "The Last Song"
Lance (with the most serious look on his face): Wow. I looked just like that in high school.
Lance and Kristi: ***Both completely silent for about 20 seconds
Lance and Kristi: ****Both burst out laughing simultaneously

I will let you determine why we were laughing. (And still are, for that matter.)

2010: A Blur

2011-01-31T10:33:00.000-08:00

I remember calling Lance from my usual all-day-long Saturday studying location as we were frantically trying to figure out how we were going to get everything done that weekend. We needed 100 more hours than we had. He needed to work all weekend on an important case at work. I needed to make substantial progress on my graduate thesis if I wanted to graduate. And our daughter needed us. We had a million things to do for our callings at church. We both felt so alone and exhausted. My first trimester was kicking me in the rear. We needed help but really didn't have any family to rely on and already felt we had exhausted the kindness of our friends. We both cried. For a long time. (well, at least I was crying. Lance probably just shed a tear or two.) And then we wiped our eyes, made a plan for how we would proceed, said a little prayer, agreed this was the hardest thing we had ever gone through, and then hung up. No use wasting more time on the phone when we already short so many hours.

This was 2010 for our family. A blur of good memories and stressful times. I didn't set any resolutions that year for a reason. But we grew as a family and realized an important lesson. Lance and I have each other. And, with the help of the Lord, we have the strength to all things.

Lance and Elisabeth attended RyGuy's and Britnee's wedding in Nebraska in March.

My brother Tommy came to visit for his annual visit. We took a trip to Palm Springs and Disneyland.

I miraculously graduated with my Master's degree. My Daddy'O came to witness this.

We celebrated 8 years of marital bliss with a three day get-a-way to Pismo Beach.
And awaited the birth of a baby boy.


We threw a HUGE graduation bash with my friend Katie Christenson at our home in June. Think we had about 100 guests attend.

Planned and attended the Smemoe/Richardson family reunion in August.

Attended Chris' and Princess Wendy's wedding in UT in August.

Welcomed the happiest and sweetest little boy, Carsten, to the world in October.
Natural childbirth was AWESOME. Can't wait to do that again.

Hosted Chris, Loren and Dad Smemoe (and their spouses/families) for Thanksgiving weekend.
This is when we blessed the little man at church.

Spent a few days in the CHOC hospital after Carsten was diagnosed with RSV.

Happily Ever After

2011-01-05T00:25:00.000-08:00

I lay in bed on New Year's Eve at the late hour of 9 p.m. reviewing my year in my head. I remembered, for some reason, that 16 years ago I had attended a Sunday church service at the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for the first time in my life. Funny enough, I was in Anaheim of all places when I did attend. (Seeing as I am from Minnesota, attending church in SoCal for the first time is a little odd, is it not?) Our High School band took a trip to San Diego/Orange County to participate in the Holiday Bowl and do fun touristy things out here. That was the beginning pages to the book titled My Life from Here. Due to my parents dislike of the LDS church, I did not join it until I was 18 years old. From 16 to 18 plus were dark times in my memory. There was great turmoil at home with my family and within my heart and soul. I couldn't see past the next month much less envision what my life would be like as a soon-to-be 32 year old.

I never foresaw me attending BYU or going on a mission to Finland. I never imagined meeting my dear husband or marrying him in the temple. I never saw my blond-haired, blue-eyed angel babies or seen myself trying to raise a family based on the teaching's of Jesus Christ. I definitely never thought in my wildest dreams I would be living in Southern California - especially after hearing my mom tell me it was going to fall off into the ocean someday. I never could imagine the blessings God had in store for me.

But here I am. And I am the happiest I have ever been in my life. Not the kind of happy where everything is perfect and exactly how you want it. Because we are far from that type of bliss. Not the kind of happiness where there is an absence of heartbreak. Because I have seen a good amount in the past 16 years and am sure I will see more in the years to come. But the kind of happiness that fills your body full of peace and pours warmth out of your heart. I feel like so many of my dreams have been fulfilled. I followed my heart and joined a church that has taught me personally how to better follow our Savior. I am married to a wonderful man. I have two children whom I love more than anything. I have both a bachelor's and master's degree. I am surrounded by family and friends who are as close as family. I am loved, I am safe, and I am healthy.

One of my favorite pictures from my wedding day almost 8 years ago.

Sometimes Happily Ever After does happen - even for a moment.

Now to find another dream.

Believe

2010-12-24T23:35:00.000-08:00

Thank you dear Santa. My heart is so thrilled you granted my Christmas wish.

Otherwise I would have missed seeing my sweet girl play Mary and my little boy play baby Jesus in our first annual nativity.

Or seeing my chubby little babe cooing in front of the Christmas tree.

Or missed seeing the stockings you lovingly stuffed for my dear ones.

So grateful we are able to celebrate our own little miracle on the eve we celebrate the best miracle in the world - the birth of our Savior.

Merry Christmas to all. And to all a good night.

A Christmas Wish

2010-12-22T22:23:00.000-08:00

Dear Santa,
My Christmas wish is simple. I just want to spend Christmas Eve at home, with my family.

(Which would mean my sweet baby would be on the mend and no longer struggling to breathe from RSV in a children's hospital and that I would get a full night's rest without nurses and doctors interrupting my slumber all night long.)

I have tried to be good. I promise.

Love,
Kristi

Carsten chillin' in his crib at CHOC Mission Hospital.

He is a HUGE flirt with all the nurses here. Even other

nurses not assigned to us have come to meet Mr. Congeniality

and be awarded with his smile, belly laughs and coos.

Fall Behind

2010-12-19T17:40:00.000-08:00

Fall has come and gone with relatively very little posts, few and far between. We did, however, celebrate Halloween and Thanksgiving.

Here are some pictures to prove it.


We attended the Pumpkin patch as a family.

Elisabeth and Papa attended her Halloween party at her preschool.


We spent Halloween day having dinner at Elisabeth's BFF's home.

The Smemoes & the Riecks

Carsten was our little pumpkin this year.

Lance and Kristi went to see Beauty and the Beast at the OCPAC and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Grandma Becky babysat one night. Kristi's friend Heidi babysat the other.

We hosted Thanksgiving at our house and had Lance's brothers' (Loren & Chris) families stay with us for four days.


Elisabeth especially loved playing with her cousins and Uncle Chris.

Elisabeth loved matching her girl cousin, Arianna

We blessed our son Carsten and gave him a name at Church. (This occasion deserves its own post. More later)

The Smemoes that visited for Thankgiving and attended Carsten's blessing.

Letter to Mom: Christmas Edition

2010-12-19T16:55:00.000-08:00

A bell I with my mom's name on it. So she can be
with us in spirit every Christmas.

Dear Mom,
I baked cut-out cookies with Elisabeth today. Just like how you used to bake cut-out cookies with me every Christmas from the time I can remember. I found a little cookie sheet, toddler-sized and showed her how to roll out the cookie dough and how to jiggle the cookie cutters so the cookies would come out easily - just like you did with me. You would have been proud. And loved to see the look of accomplishment on her chubby little face when the cookies were on her little cookie tray and in the oven. And just like you, I forgot to document it with my camera.

This is the season where I miss you the most. I miss baking with you. I miss seeing your boxes of cards and hand written Christmas greetings cluttering up the living room. I miss your decorating flare and how even the window sills were adorned with Christmas nick nacks you had accumulated over the years. I miss spending hours in the freezing basement, wrapping the multitudes of gifts you got for everyone. I miss your oyster stew and the lutefisk you made every year for Dad. I miss attending Christmas Eve Lutheran service with you and singing joyous songs about our Savior's birth together with the rest of the congregation. You were the epitome of Christmas spirit. And we all loved you more for it. You made Christmas special for us. So much that I still want to still believe in Santa Clause and want my children to see the spirit, magic and wonder of Christmas - the same why you did for us.

I am trying desperately to create the same spirit of Christmas here in our home with our wee ones. From the nativity scene at the base of the Christmas tree to baking so many sweets we are bound to be diabetic, you live in my heart and are part of your grandchildren's Christmas each year. We love and miss you.

Your daughter,
Kristi

Babysitting Co-op

2010-12-04T22:53:00.000-08:00

Tonight we watched three other children that were not our own. In our care were the following: a 7 month old, a 13 month old, 2 two year olds and a 2 month old baby. The night was utter chaos. Between a teething baby who sobbed if he wasn't being held, crazy two year olds who are learning how to share and use the potty, a newborn that needs to eat every two hours and needs to be cuddled often and another little crawler who grabs and gets into everything, we barely survived. At one point I was nursing Carsten and holding a sad baby in my lap at the same time.

As four children slumber peacefully upstairs and Lance snores in the Lazy Boy, I would consider the evening a success. Despite having to get two babies down to bed at the same time, Elisabeth pooping in the bathtub while she was taking a bath with her best friend, and the 7 month old dumping a pitcher of water all over the table, herself and the floor during dinner time - yes, a success. I still need to bleach my tub. That will have to wait until tomorrow.

We are part of a babysitting co-op with three other families in our area. Each couple picks a Saturday or Friday each month when they are available to watch the children of the other families. If everyone participates on the given Saturday, there are 7 children total - two infants, one young toddler, three toddlers and one school-aged child. The five hours we have these kids are probably the longest five hours in the month.

But having three date nights a month where we don't have to pay a babysitter - totally worth it. The idea is actually ingenious. Don't you think?

Lance amidst the chaos.

To Carsten With Love - 1 Month

2010-11-24T14:12:00.000-08:00

Papa's favorite - copyright Beatta Bosworth

Dear Carsten,
I can't believe you are already a month old (and then some). The last few weeks have been a blur, the days melding into one as I catch hours of sleep here and there. However, I can't remember being happier. You are such a snuggle bunny, always wanting to hunker down against the chest of whomever is holding you. You have such a peaceful and calm spirit about you and usually only cry when you want to be held or fed.

Here were your 1 month stats:

Weight: 10 lbs - 50th percentile
Length: 24 inches - 90th percentile

Long and semi-lean, our little green bean.

What I love best about you are the sweet cooing sounds (which reminds me of a dove) you make when you return our smiles. Elisabeth has been heard to say many an occasion "Look Mama! He is smiling at me! He likes me!" That you do - just hearing her voice makes you smile.

Wishing I could freeze this time forever - when your sweet little spirit is so fresh from Heaven. We are so glad you chose to come to our family.

With Love,
Mama

Carsten John - 2 weeks old. copyright Beatta Bosworth

Smitten

2010-10-31T14:23:00.000-07:00

I am absolutely smitten with these little ones. The older one makes me smile every day with her cheerful and full-of-life personality and her constant chatter. She may not always be obedient but she is quite happy and excited about life. Her personality is contagious.

The little one is heaven-sent. I don't ever want to put this snuggle bunny down. And he knows it. He protests quite strongly when I do. He has such a calm presence about him. Something tells me he will be the peacemaker of our family.

Can't help but want at least two or three more of these.

Carsten's Birth Story

2010-10-17T12:30:00.000-07:00

I am not sure what it is, but us mothers always want to know the details of each others' births. Maybe it can be compared to military veterans sharing their battle tales or returned missionaries sharing their mission stories. I think it is because all of these things become a part of who we are and say something about our character. Carsten's birth was an experience I will cherish forever. And for those who want to know the details, I won't disappoint. This is the "unabridged" version of his birth.

***************************************************************

Preface: We had decided about two months ago that I was going to do this birth naturally. Not that I am against epidurals - In fact, there was about 15 minutes during my labor this time where I was begging for one. However, I do believe birth is a natural process and that our bodies know what they should be doing. I heard recovery was so much easier after a natural birth (and as my recovery with Elisabeth was quite difficult, this was appealing.) But, most importantly something inside of me felt it was the right thing to do. We have had so many medical interventions getting pregnant, having a natural birth was my way of reclaiming something we lost at conception.

We signed up for a 6 week Hynobabies class and spent time everyday preparing for Carsten to arrive by practicing relaxation, meditation, and positive affirmations. You use a series of CDs that have tracks with relaxation music and a person speaking with a soothing voice along with scripts that Lance would read to me while I listened to music. I will post more details about this childbirth program later. I do have to say I know that it was because of the techniques I learned in this class I was able to have a natural birth.

Wed., Oct. 6th - Pre-labor. I had contractions on and off all day. Sometimes they were close - like 7 minutes and other times they were a vast 20 minutes apart. None of them were painful. Lance stayed home from work and we spent the day with Elisabeth making rice krispy treats, baking brownies, taking walks and going to the park. My contractions had slowed down so much that I encouraged Lance to attend a work dinner in Newport Beach that night.

I went to bed at 11 p.m., listening to one of my Hypnobabies CD's through the night. I woke up about once an hour to a sharp contraction and then would go back to sleep.

Thursday, Oct. 7th - 2:00 a.m. Woke up to really intense contractions that were close together. After about 30 minutes of trying to cope with them on my own, I decided I needed Lance to wake up to help me. We started timing them and they were 3 minutes apart and lasted 1 - 1 1/2 minutes long.

3:30 a.m. - I had wanted to labor at home as long as possible because I was most comfortable there. However, Lance started to feel that it was "time" for us to go to the hospital since the contractions were so close together. After making the necessary calls to our "middle of the night" sitter, our doula (my good friend Becky a.k.a. my surrogate mom) and the doctor, we were off to the hospital. (Dr. K's words to Lance when he called "You need to come to the hospital. NOW." ) I listened to a Hypnobabies track on the way to the hospital and I felt very relaxed and at peace.

4:15 a.m. - We checked into the hospital. We spent about 45 minutes in L&D triage where they had me change, go to the bathroom and then monitored my contractions and the baby's heart rate. I was already dilated to 7 cm. Whoohoo! I continued to listen to one of my Hypnobabies track the whole time and found it invaluable to helping me stayed relaxed. I don't remember feeling a lot of pain - just pressure.

5:00 a.m. - I was moved to our Labor and Delivery suite. No sooner did I arrive than I started to enter transition. Because the nurse wanted to monitor me closely, I had to stay close to the bed. This was NOT helpful as I couldn't get comfortable. My contractions were right on top of each other, without a break in between. My state of relaxation quickly dissolved as I couldn't find a comfortable position to labor in. (Not to mention the nurse kept pressing on my belly during every contraction. Once again, NOT helpful.)

The point of no return: I am embarrassed to admit that I completely lost it for about 15 minutes during my transition - I begged, cried, and pleaded with Lance to let me get the epidural. I kept saying "I know you are disappointed in me but I really need it." Both Lance and Becky kept trying to get me to relax and kept reminding me that since I was feeling I couldn't do it anymore, the baby was almost here. The nurse offered to check to see how far along I was and then let us decide what we wanted to do. She checked - and I was at 10 cm already. The point of no return. I started to sob, remembering Elisabeth's birth and how long I had to push with her. And the nurse sweetly told me "Kristi, you are just going to have to use your techniques you have learned to get through this." I prayed. Really hard. And then, knowing the only way was forward, I started to focus on using the Hypnobabies techniques again and could feel myself relaxing again.

Moving forward: The time table for the rest of the birth is hazy. My water finally broke a few minutes later and then my body just started to voluntarily push and my contractions slowed down. This was the neatest experience for me - when I had Elisabeth, I was told when and how to push and pushing lasted for about 1 1/2 hours. This time, I only focused on what Lance was saying to me as he read the Hypnobabies script, and I pushed the way my body told me to. And I continually prayed. Five or six contractions later, my little guy barreled into the world.

And then the pressure disappeared. And my perfect little boy was there, crying his little heart out. I had done it. And surprisingly, it felt wonderful - empowering. The doctors and nurses were impressed with his birth and they kept telling us so. I don't remember much of what they said. I just remember holding my wailing infant in my arms, free of pain, and feeling like he was a gift from heaven.

Epilogue: As I tried to fall asleep the day Carsten was born, I was just overwhelmed with his whole birth and couldn't stop replaying it in my head. I couldn't wait to write down my feelings. Elisabeth's birth was a miracle but it was not one I wanted to repeat anytime soon. It was long and exhausting. Carsten's was so different.

Was a natural birth painful? During transition I would have to honestly say YES. Oh, YES. Carsten came so quickly I didn't ever have time to adapt to the hospital environment or get into my deep relaxation "zone" I had practiced at home. Would I do it again? YES, YES, YES, YES, YES. I don't think I will ever have an epidural again.

I can't justify my feelings with words but the having Carsten naturally was one of the most amazing, spiritual experiences I have ever had in my life. Being at a brink where I felt like I couldn't do it anymore and then overcoming that, working with my body to birth a child, and then having the instant relief of pain being replaced by pure joy with the new infant. Priceless. Something about the experience is empowering and made me feel closer to our Savior. I couldn't have done it without Him. Nor could I have done it without Lance's calming demeanor, encouraging me along the whole time. Nor could I have done it without Becky's helpful hand, doing whatever she could to support us.

Life is good.

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! - Illustrated version

2010-10-10T22:30:00.000-07:00

Carsten John - How can you not love this face?

Dr. Kaminskas, Kristi and Carsten (center). Dr. Kaminskas kept telling us she was so "proud" and gave us all hugs.

Elisabeth's first words out of her mouth when she met Carsten were "I want to hold him!!!"

Carsten's going home outfit. Notice the smocking :-)

Carsten is so long and wiry - quite different than his sister was!

Head-to-toe shot

Mama and the rest of the family were so happy to see baby Carsten!

Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!

2010-10-07T12:47:00.000-07:00

After a relatively short period of active labor and about an hour in the delivery room, we were happy to welcome a new baby boy into the world this morning!

I'll post pictures after I get home tonight, but in the meantime, here are the specs:

Name: Carsten John
Birthdate & time: October 7, 2010, 6:08 a.m.
Weight: 7 lbs. 2 oz.
Height: 20 inches

Mama, baby, and the rest of the family are doing great! It was heartwarming to see Elisabeth give baby Carsten a big hug this morning.
- Lance

Waiting for the best things. . .

2010-10-05T14:30:00.000-07:00

Love, love, love this picture.

One of the reasons I became interested in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as a teenager was the religion's focus on the family. Mainly, that families could be together forever. What an amazing concept - to spend eternity with those that you love.

We were able to be there to witness when Lance's brother, Chris, started his forever family with my new SIL, Wendy, in the Salt Lake City Temple in August. And it was beautiful. And touching. And exciting. All at the same time.

We love Christopher. It could be because he is so generous and selfless and cool and we spend more time with him than any of Lance's siblings. Yet that isn't why he is pretty special to our family.

The happy couple with most of the nieces and nephews.

Lance and Chris

When we were struggling to get pregnant and have children, I felt like there was an unsaid connection and understanding between Chris and us. He wasn't married. We didn't have kids. In a religion like ours that focuses so much on family, this is heartbreaking. There are constant reminders everywhere that we either didn't have a spouse in which to share life or children in which to find joy. Whenever we were together with Lance's growing, huge family, there was always a reminder that everyone was progressing forward in life without us - We still remained childless for 6 years while multiple babies were born and Chris still remained alone, while slowly everyone got married. We never really talked about it (how awkward would that be to discuss my innermost feelings with my brother-in-law? Maybe almost as awkward as me posting them here - publicly. Let me apologize publicly - Sorry, Chris.), but I always felt in my heart that Chris understood what we were going through in a way no one else could.

After we had Elisabeth, there was nothing more that I wanted than for Chris to find his special someone. I didn't want him to be the only one "left behind."

So, with many tears and much laughter, we were able to witness him being sealed to one of the most intelligent and kind women I have ever met. We couldn't be happier for them and even saying that doesn't justify how we feel.

Priceless. We have the temple marriage lesson down pat. Now to work on modesty.

The best things do come to those who wait. Even better for those who wait patiently (which is NOT me. Still waiting for baby #2 to show up.)

All's Quiet on the Homefront

2010-10-04T22:36:00.000-07:00

Spent the day walking around the mall and running various errands due to an unseasonal rain.

Made the following eclectic purchases:
- two Thanksgiving placemats from Pottery Barn kids
- a Cinderella nightgown for one of Elisabeth's Christmas presents
- a box of See's candy to surprise Lance at work
- a bone for Sofi
- a birthday card
- two hot dogs from Costco

Guess baby is now technically "overdue" though I am still pretty calm. He will come when he is ready to come.

Rocking Her World

2010-10-03T19:59:00.000-07:00

I went into Elisabeth's bedroom last night and crawled into bed with her. I scratched her back while she slept and couldn't help but feel a little melancholy. We are about to rock this little sweetheart's world. She is going to go from being the beloved, only child who has her parents undivided attention to having to share every moment with an incredibly needy, yet sweet newborn brother. And that is just the beginning.

Many times these past few weeks Lance and I have looked at each other and asked ourselves (while chuckling) "What were we thinking?" Of course we want our son to be born into our family. But. . . I am not sure we are ready to enter into the world of parenthood for those with multiple children.

Ready or not, change is immanent. And to our credit, we have never been ones to have lofty expectations for the future. We just kinda jump into things, head first, taking things as they come.

I just hope this little independent girl will weather the storm of change with grace.

And this mom can shake the feeling of guilt for shattering the only life her daughter has known.

****************************************

Note: As you probably already guessed, no baby yet. I am going to try to do a post a day so if you notice a day goes by without a post you will know I am most likely at the hospital having a baby.

Two Nos and a Yes

2010-10-02T22:05:00.000-07:00

No baby yet, for those who are diligently checking my blog to see what is going on. Wait, is there anyone out there diligently checking my blog? Maybe not. I can only dream.

No baby name yet. Two names are high in the running - Carsten and John. Elisabeth is partial to Carsten. Lance is partial to John. And I am stuck somewhere in the middle. Carsten was my great-grandpa who came over from Norway to the U.S. It is a strong, good name that means "Follower of Christ" and has German roots. And it is very unique. John was my grandpa's name as well as one of Lance's greats, and has a lot of meaning to us because that is what Elisabeth named her son in the New Testament after waiting years and years for him to come. Besides, who wouldn't want their son to aspire to be like John the Baptist? So, we continue to debate and hope that our baby will come home with a name.

Yes, I am pretty much ready. My hospital bag was packed just tonight. Elisabeth's clothes have been packed and sent over to her friend's house where she will stay and the dog has been bathed and her bedding washed so her caretakers won't regret offering to take her too much. And I have baked enough zucchini bread that if I don't cook for a week or so, we can live off of that.

Ready or not, our little boy can come anytime now. We look forward to meeting him!

Me at 39 weeks, 5 days. He is certainly a lot more compact than Elisabeth was. However, my arms have definitely fattened up a bit - making me feel like a beached whale whenever I take Elisabeth to the pool or attend my bi-weekly water aerobics class.

38 weeks pregnant with Elisabeth

A Good Work Ethic

2010-09-29T10:08:00.000-07:00

I am all about teaching a good work ethic to my family. Nothing bothers me more than people *without* a good work ethic. Instilling this in my family is high on my priority list. (As high as learning the art of relaxation is on Lance's.)

Papa has his work during the day and a small laundry list of household chores that belong to him and only him.

Elisabeth is in charge of setting the table, feeding the dog (yet another reason Sofi is overweight), picking up her toys, and unloading the silverware when the dishwasher is done. No, we are not breaking any childhood slavery laws. She enjoys helping. So I give into her whims to always help me cook, bake, and set the table at dinner time. Realistically, I only have a few years before she realizes that she would rather be playing than working so I am taking full advantage of the joy she receives from helping me out.

For me, my chore list is never-ending, just like the mountain of laundry that sits at the end of our bed waiting to be folded. One can only do so much.

Sofi is the laziest member of our household. She sleeps most of the day and night, only waking for food, a walk, a few minutes of play every evening, and to move from the sofa to her bed to our bed throughout the day.

We have decided she needs to be assigned more responsibilities around the house.

First chore - babysitting. As you can see, the role play with dolls seems to be going really well.

When you're the best of friends

2010-09-01T20:41:00.000-07:00

Elisabeth and Tutti - 4th of July, 2010

Elisabeth and Taylor are the best of friends. They have so much fun playing with each other and as of late, getting into a lot of trouble - Like drawing all over Elisabeth's nice kitchen set with pen, finger painting with bright blue fertilizer or locking themselves into my car and pretending to "drive."

Elisabeth started calling Taylor "Tutti" for some reason and it has stuck. Taylor doesn't mind, though only Elisabeth and Elisabeth's family can call her that.

They love having matching shoes and always have to wear similar clothes. Elisabeth likes to wear dresses daily. Tutti - not so much. But, whenever we get together to play, Tutti dones a dress so she can be just like her friend.

Tutti's mom, who happens to be one of my best friends, goes back to work tomorrow as a teacher, meaning that both EB and I will not be able to spend as much time with our good friends. I think we will both go through major withdrawal.

Friends are a true blessing, no matter how old you are.

At a loss

2010-08-20T14:00:00.000-07:00

The terrible twos. Or at least this is what I am hoping it is with Elisabeth because then that means there may be an end in sight for all the temper tantrums, incessant whining, and battle of wills we have had every day as of late.

I read this online today:

Conviction, determination, and tenaciousness are all as much a part of being strong willed as are incurable temper tantrums. So my 'parenting the strong willed toddler' tip of the day is to learn to look at these battle of the wills differently. Learn to see what could become rather than what is at the immediate moment.

Hmmm, sounds a little like me, minus the tantrums part.

I keep praying for patience, but really, I would just like someone to tell me what I need to do to see more of the sweet girl I know is hiding down inside this toddler. Anyone got some good advice? Or at least some parenting books I could read?

Terrified for when we bring the new baby home.

This time around

2010-08-18T21:11:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I have less than two months before "Baby Brother" arrives. With Elisabeth, I kept a detailed pregnancy journal. With this baby, not so much. Here is my attempt to start a journal for him. Sorry, bub. The curse of being the 2nd born, I guess.

Peanut Butter - Can't get enough of it. That and watermelon. (Not to mention smoothies and carrot cake.)
Where's the Beef? - Can't stand chicken at all this pregnancy. I rarely make it and I will only order it if it is on a salad at a restaurant.
Laid-back personality? - His heart rate is much slower than his sister's was. My OBGYN always claims that he likes to relax when she finds his heartbeat on the doppler. We are hoping she is right.
Fit Mama - I have consistently exercised three times a week. Between Zumba, water aerobics, the eliptical, walking, swimming and prenatal yoga, I have tried to stay active. As a result, I have gained much less weight so far than I have with Elisabeth. I think I might even be smaller. (See picture below. What do you think?)
Ouch! - Those are my ribs! This baby LOVES to stretch out and hook his toes behind my ribs.
Catching my ZZZZ's - I am utterly exhausted all the time. I am convinced it has more to do with recovering from grad school, chasing after an active 2 year old all day and our recent move, but I am sure my gestating of another human being has something to do with it.
Name Game - We haven't decided on a name yet. We figured we would go to the hospital with a few names we like and then decide. Three things we did decide on - all of our children will have one family name, their names will have meaning, and their names will most likely be classic, old fashioned names.
Hynobaby - I am going to try to go au natural this go around. As a result we are taking a Hypnobabies class. Call me crazy, call me brave, call me whatever. Let's just see how it goes.

One thing remains a constant. I love being pregnant. Besides the stressful first trimester when I am considered "high risk," there is nothing more that I enjoy than being able to carry and grow a miracle in my body for nine months. Nothing is more divine or makes me feel closer to Heavenly Father. I still feel twinges of sadness when I think of all of those women out there who want children and can't have them. That is one question I am sure to ask after I die.

Putting off until tomorrow

2010-08-15T21:44:00.000-07:00

Here is pretty how much every night goes for me.

Around 7:30 p.m., I put Elisabeth to bed.
I then sit on the computer to check my email - saying I will only be on there 20 minutes.
An hour later, I start to visualize all the things that need to be done.
An hour and a half later, I give into exhaustion and decide it can all wait until tomorrow.
Amazing how much stuff piles up when you put off today what you can do tomorrow.

But, we are moved into our new home. Are mostly unpacked besides the non-essentials - like pictures on the walls, books on our shelves, and knick-knacks on the fireplace. We finished planning and attended our family reunion. Had a blast but glad to have that behind us. And I've got 7 weeks to gather up enough energy to nest. And dream about the relaxing vacations I can't wait to take again with Lance - like the one we took in May to the Central Coast.

Moving, moving, moving

2010-07-06T16:11:00.000-07:00

After a discussion with my SIL Lisa over the phone, she indicated she thought I liked to be crazy-busy after I told her all we had going on this summer. I laughed. Maybe she is right. I don't know if I LIKE it, but I do know I am used to it. I need to be de-programmed I guess. Are there any self-help groups out there for people who are over-scheduled all the time? If so, send me the info. I think I need it.

To spare you the lengthy explanation of all the balls I am juggling in the air this month and next, here is my check-list to give you an idea. (Just so you know, it is Lance's and my turn to plan his family reunion so that is why our checklist is so long.)

Kristi's To Do List - July
Moving Stuff (To do before July 19th)
- ~~Contact Movers to get quotes~~
- Arrange time to sign lease w/ new landlord
- ~~Request packing help from friends~~
- Go through house to find stuff to sell at garage sale
- Price garage sale stuff
- Make signs for garage sale
- Create filing system & file papers in office
- Pack up the house
- ~~List washer/dryer on Craigslist.org~~
- Move over breakables/etc. to our new home July 17th
- ~~Return the guest bed to our neighbor~~

Family Reunion Stuff (To do before July 31st)
- ~~Make plane reservations~~
- ~~Verify hotel reservations~~
- ~~Order tickets for Silver Dollar City~~
- Pass on info to BIL to order t-shirts
- Reserve boats for boating day
- Plan menu for BBQ lunch
- Create food shopping list
- Arrange dinner for Monday night @ hotel
- Send out misc. cost info to family members
- Create reunion packets (Lance to do)
- Pack

MSIDTAA
- Send my bio/picture to president for website
- Schedule webinars for 2010/2011
- Create Google Calendar for upcoming events

Contract Work
- Finish reviewing two courses for Chevron's PTEC Phase IV
- Create Flash exercise for Chevron's Ross Hill contract
- Create TOC for Ross Hill Contract
- Bill Westmed for additional database support time
- Send in new contract
- Assist w/ four seminars at Coastline's Summer Technology Institute

Primary
- Plan and Teach Sharing Time for all of July
- Update rosters & rolls w/ new move-ins
- Update blog for July

Misc.
- Sign up EB for swimming lessons
- Work out at gym three times a week (for sanity purposes)
~~- Reschedule teeth cleaning~~
- ~~Take glucose tolerance test~~

Tired yet? Here's to praying fervently I can get all of this done by August 1st AND that these happenings don't send me into pre-term labor!

Fold your paws, Sofi

2010-07-06T11:17:00.000-07:00

Though Elisabeth isn't the most reverent child during family prayer, she sure loves it. She always calls the dog into the bedroom for family prayer or when we have visitors, such as Uncle "Wootie" and Ralphie Dog, they must join us as well. "Family Pwayer Time" She rarely keeps her arms folded for more than one second and never closes her eyes. Nor does she sit in one spot - she is usually trying to jump on our bed or twirl the rocking chair around or even run down the hallway.

But she is the arm folding police.

Last night, these words came out of her mouth and are still making me smile today.

"Fold your paws, Sofi. Come on, Sofi. Fold your paws."

I can't help but feel sorry for this poor beagle. I think it is possible to love a dog too much.

Finding Joy

2010-06-11T13:45:00.000-07:00

Having a toddler teaches me many things. More than anything, Elisabeth has taught me to find joy in everyday life. How much less stressed would be as adults if we. . .

Wore whatever we felt like wearing, regardless of the occasion. And sang uplifting songs like "A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes" whenever we put those clothes on.

Took our dog on a walk every day.

Stopped to smell the flowers.

And held hands with someone special to us.

Yup, I think she has figured it out.

Because I just can't seem to relax. . .

2010-06-03T08:03:00.000-07:00

Someone nominated me to be the VP of Programs for the MSIDT Alumni Association. No worries, I think. There has to be multiple candidates. No one will vote for me.

Wrong, as usual. I am the only one up for the position. Granted, the Alumni Association only has a few events during the year but . . .still.

My guess is it is one of these two - my grad school partners in crime, Randy and Tai:

Good thing I am so forgiving.

We also sent in our notice to vacate our lease this week. We have been talking about moving to a smaller, cheaper place for a few years. Last year didn't work out as we had guests the time of the move. I know it is the rational and logical decision as we want to buy a house and that won't happen as long as we are paying as much as we do for rent.

Anyone want to explain to me why I haven't been able to stop crying since I sealed up the letter of our fate? I seriously want to go back to that big, blue mailbox and somehow figure out how to rescue this notice to vacate from the letters inside. Or beg Lance to call our landlord back and tell him we changed our mind. Major regret. I do want to buy a house. I do want to save money. But I can't stand to say goodbye to this house. We have lived here longer than we have lived anywhere before and I love it. Plus, I hate to say goodbye to the jacuzzi bathtub. And, let's face it. I loathe moving more than snakes. Which is probably more than I loathe anything in this world.

Maybe we should just not pack up or leave and keep sending in rent. Maybe they won't notice.

Picture Proof

2010-05-28T13:44:00.000-07:00

MSIDT Graduation from Cal State University, Fullerton

May 22, 2010

Exhaustion

2010-05-21T22:45:00.000-07:00

Graduation is tomorrow. I can't figure out why everyone else seems much more excited about my graduation than me. Then it occurred to me - I am just plain exhausted and don't have much energy to celebrate. Between running after a determined toddler who has been out of her sleep schedule (meaning we get less sleep), to being 21 weeks pregnant, to trying to catch up on housework we have let go over the past year, to figuring out when in the world I am going to finish my internship and start my two contract jobs, I am just too tired right now to give my well-earned graduation the hoo-rah it needs. Not to mention that I just finished my last semester of grad school.

I wonder if any other graduates feel this way. Really, I can't wait for tomorrow to be over. This is one chapter in my life I can't wait to put behind me. Grateful I did it? Yes. Would I do it again? Maybe. Ask me again in a few months.

As for now, just put me in a hotel room, away from life for three days and I can guarantee you I will be sleeping. A LOT.

Balance in the Universe

2010-05-18T20:06:00.000-07:00

Our family of three (four, if you count the dog) will be welcoming another boy into the family this Fall. Lance breathed a sigh of relief. There is balance in the universe. Or at least a little more balance in our household. Baby Boy is healthy and growing steadily. I can't believe we are half-way done!

The Prodigal Dog

2010-05-15T14:15:00.000-07:00

I had to have a talk with Sofi today, who ran away. Luckily, the receptionist at the nearby animal hospital saw our chubby beagle non-chalantly meandering past their office and he pulled her inside and gave us a call. Our guess is she was looking for Papa Johns, as we often take her with us when we go to pick up a pizza ordered. Her hysterical Mama was never more over-joyed to see her first baby safe and not in the dog pound or worse yet - dead on the side of the road. (The animal hospital is at an intersection of two of the busiest roads in our city.) After I loved her up and gave her lots of kisses and hugs, she was lectured on how good she at it at our house and how she should never, never, never, ever, run away again. Seriously, Sofi. You have your own room. You have a big backyard. You have a toddler that feeds you tasty morsels every day. You are lucky to be alive.

I think she was sorry.

Lance had to have a talk with Elisabeth today, who opened the front door to help Sofi escape. He warned her if she let Sofi out the front door that we may never see Sofi again. She cried. And then she went with Lance to help find our dog in her new Cindi-rella dress she got from her WV family. She kept hollering "Sofi" in her scratchy, two-year old voice, in hopes Sofi would come back.

I know she was sorry. She told her Papa so.

Oh, the adventures we have. I wonder how our next baby will fit into the mix.

Relief.

2010-05-14T14:11:00.000-07:00

I am officially done with the MSIDT program at Cal State Fullerton and in a week from Saturday, I will have a Masters of Science degree in Instructional Design and Technology.

Relief. That is the only word I can find to describe how we ALL feel in this house. RELIEF.

Now, let the celebrating begin.

(Elisabeth reading my Dreamweaver book. Besides having an absentee mom, she got to learn about website design these past few months.)

It'll All Be Over Soon

2010-04-14T20:35:00.000-07:00

Ever see Titanic? If you did, remember the line a panicked mom whispers to her toddler as she stands on the deck as the ship is about to sink into the ocean?

"It'll all be over soon."

That is what I keep telling myself every day, feeling something a little similar to what the mother meant. No, I am NOT dying. Nor do I mean to compare graduate school to a tragic death. But it is painful. And somewhat of a nightmare. It is more overwhelming than I can imagine. And so stressful that I can't wait to see the end of it.

29 days until my grad project must be completed and brought to the bindery at CSFU. 29 days until I am done with post-bac school forever. 29 days until I can breathe again. 29 days until my home can have some semblance of order and I can stop resorting to having my baby watching Disney movies. Though I have to admit, Lady in the Tramp is quite a good flick. Don't you think?

29 days.

***********************************
Post script: I guess I come across as complaining a lot. Let me just recap the following two weeks so you can understand why my simple task of completing a grad school project has helped turn my life into a nightmare.

Horrible facial pain over Easter weekend that required constant icing of the face.
Two hours spent in Urgent Care on Monday, after finding out my regular doc was on vacation. I was prescribed an antibiotic.
Facial and tooth pain that got increasingly worse throughout the day on Monday. Enough that I called my dentist who told me it probably wasn't related to my teeth and more likely my sinuses.
Awake all night Monday with the worst pain I have ever experienced in life. Much worse than giving birth. Enough that I asked Lance to either a) take me to the emergency room or b) knock me out with a bat. He did not do either, worried it would have a negative effect on my baby.
Almost passing out from pain while driving to the endodontist Tuesday morning. The Spirit whispered "Pull over now." I did. SCARY.
Receiving a root canal that took THREE hours to complete due to the insane infection in my tooth.
Finding out it takes 5 visits to the dentist to receive a permanent crown. FIVE.
Also discovering I have to get another night guard once my crown is in place. AND my dental insurance has run out for 2010.
Realizing that my root canal and my crown will cost us $1000. Good bye post-graduation cruise, my monthly house cleaner, and my babysitter for Elisabeth. We just can't afford you.
Recently diagnosed with a UTI and blood pressure that keeps creeping up higher and higher. Go figure. My poor pregnant body can not handle all of this stress.

The good news: Novocain is God's nectar. I almost kissed my endodontist when he took all of my pain away. I started pre-natal yoga up again. Elisabeth is starting to talk in sentences. Lance has taken over doing the dishes. I get to go away for a weekend to scrapbook with my friends in April. Harry Potter #7 is supposed to come out in November. AND only 29 more days.

I know this is what you all really want to see. This is Elisabeth helping me make rice crispy treats. She and I have matching aprons.

Dear Mr. President

2010-04-01T11:33:00.000-07:00

Dear Mr. President:

Can you please make sure that you raise federal taxes for all of your new programs you are funding? And make sure you use our tax money to bail out those affected by the mortgage crisis. Because between what we pay the federal government and what we pay our state, we currently only have to pay about 30% of our annual income to the powers that be. And really - I don't think that is enough. I mean, what do we need 30% of our income for? Maybe so we can someday purchase a house? But in the time being, please, use our money to pay for someone else's.

Sincerely,
Kristi

Dear Mom, Wishing you were here. . .

2010-03-29T23:32:00.000-07:00

Dear Mom,
Wishing you were here. . . Not only just here on Earth again, but here in California and in good health. Wishing you were here to help with the loads of laundry that are overtaking my garage, living room and bedroom. Wishing you were here to help make dinners on the days I am way too sick to even think of making food. Wishing you were here to entertain Elisabeth so I could catch up in school. Wishing you were here so I would have someone to just be a companion on the many nights Lance works late. Wishing you were here to rub my lower back that is just killing me after I pulled some muscles yesterday. Wishing you were here so I could be less stressed, more rested and actually grateful that I am in graduate school instead of constantly questioning why in the world I am doing this and secretly harboring desires to quit. But most of all, wishing you were here because I miss you. Sometimes a girl just needs her mom.

I know you are shaking your head at me right now. Rightfully so. I know I am blessed with great visiting teachers and friends who have offered to take Elisabeth for play dates so I can have more time to get caught up. I know I am blessed that Lance tries to do a chore every day around the house so we only live in the 90% chaos. I know I am blessed that Elisabeth loves peanut butter and jelly and that there are healthy options for take-out. I know I am blessed to be pregnant again. I have much to be thankful for.

However, that doesn't change the fact that I need you and I continually try to envision you here to mother me.

I love you.

Kristi

Fluffy

2010-03-25T09:18:00.000-07:00

Elisabeth this a.m. after searching for something in each of our bathroom drawers:
"Mama, I "ahnt" fluffy my teef."
Me: "Huh? You want to fluffy your teeth?
Elisabeth: "Uh-huh."
Me inside my head: "Fluffy? She wants to fluffy her teeth?" And then it occurred to me. Fluffy = Floss.
Me to her: "You want to floss your teeth?"
Elisabeth: "YES!"

I am so relieved she likes to floss her teeth already. Maybe it will make our first dentist visit in a few months much more pleasant.

New Spring Duds. . .

2010-03-20T11:19:00.000-07:00

To announce a new fall arrival. Baby Bear #2 estimated to
arrive Oct. 5, 2010.

I had a "rule" that I should wait until my 2nd trimester to announce such things (based on my past losses) but seeing as I am 12 weeks tomorrow, I have had four really good ultrasounds, and most of my clothes are really, really snug, I couldn't keep it a secret any longer. Besides, I am ready to stop fretting that something may go wrong (okay, fretting is an understatement. Try all out sick with irrational worry) and start being excited for yet another blessing in our lives. Power of positive thinking, right?

Now, if I can just continue to push through the exhaustion and nausea and finish my graduate project, then I will TRULY have something to celebrate.

Awwwww

2010-03-15T20:26:00.000-07:00

Smiling yet?

I love this candid shot at my brother-in-law and sister-in-law's wedding reception. Congratulations Ryan and Britnee!!!! The bride and groom look so in love, my other niece is having a ball with grandpa, and my little princess is dancing the night away with one of her favorite boy cousins in a little red velvet number that she has dubbed her "Arella" dress.

Moments like these are meant to be remembered.

Pain Medication

2010-02-25T13:55:00.000-08:00

I have determined that completing the graduate thesis (or in my case, the culminating graduate research project) has to be about the most painful, educational process EVER. I will do it. I will complete it. But I will kick and scream and suffer the whole way through it. I am excited to complete my project. I am just not too excited to write the five chapters plus appendices that must accompany the aforementioned project.

Alright. Not too excited is an understatement.

On the brighter side, Elisabeth's little toddler personality has provided me much pain relief as I undertake this ordeal. Here are just a few things that keep me smiling as I pound out yet another chapter:

Collector: Beth has turned into quite a collector. She is not happy with ONE of anything. She had to carry around TWO blankets and all ten of her little Disney books that her Grandpa Mimi sent her to her babysitter's today. I have considered buying her a back pack to carry around her treasures.
Naming: When we asked her two weeks ago what her name was, she answered "Baby." Oops. Our bad. Now, she insists her name is "Beth." So, Beth it is (though we still call her Elisabeth and Baby Bear more often than not.)
The Apple: Doesn't fall too far from the tree. Elisabeth, for better or worse, takes after me. Determined, passionate and sensitive. Not to mention a Type A through and through. I got up out of bed yesterday to find her playing around in the shower. I told her it was time to get out and she answered with "Mama. Go to bed." Whoa! Where did that sass come from? After we laughed and sufficiently parented, she asked for a kiss, said she was sorry and then left the shower. A+ for verbal skills. C- for manners.
Lil' Chef: To keep her entertained while I cook, I have her fill in the role as sous chef. We will put on our matching aprons, which she finds pleasing to no end, pull up a chair, and cook together. She loves to "season" what I am making with as many spice bottles I will let her handle. And she especially loves to taste what we are making. As long as I don't use anything loud, such as the hand mixer, she couldn't be happier to "help" out.

Well, enough of my creative avoidance. I hope to post pictures soon.

Dance Party

2010-02-20T14:52:00.000-08:00

When: Every Saturday
Who: Anyone in our family - even the beagle
What: Involves about 20 minutes of the whole family dancing to a few fun, dancing songs.
Why: To establish a new family tradition. And seriously - who can't enjoy the day after rocking out to "Steal My Sunshine" or slow dancing to "Lady in Red" or watching Elisabeth get her groove on for "The Happy Little Working Song" from Enchanted.
Attire: Pajamas. Sunglasses optional.

Kids say the darndest things

2010-02-05T09:17:00.000-08:00

Elisabeth has been chatting up a storm and has said some pretty amusing things as of late. In fact, sometimes she says things that shock us as we had no idea that she grasped the concept. Here is just a sampling.

***********************
Sofi came out of the vet's office with a pink bandana around her neck. When Elisabeth saw this she exclaimed "Mama! Sofi's pretty! Sofi rincess (princess)." She asks daily to watch "Arella." (Cinderella)

**************************
We were on our way to pick Lance up from work so we could go to dinner as a family. I tend to narrate everything we do so Elisabeth can pick up more language skills.

Me: We are going to Papa's work to pick him up.
EB: Ohhhh. Papa's home. Go Papa's home.
Me: (chuckling) So you think Papa lives at work? Work is his home?
EB: Yeah.

***************************
We lent my car to our friends for a few days and thus our garage was empty. Elisabeth went into the garage with Papa and was visibly upset. "Where bye-bye go?" she asked worriedly.

***************************
Elisabeth and I were playing with her Little People farm set. I was holding up the animals and asking her to identify them. She can say the name of every animal except a cow (cow=moo in Elisabethese). I then held up the farmer, and asked her what his name was.
EB: A boy.
Me: (shocked she knew what a boy was. I held up a girl farmer) What is this?
EB: A dearl.

****************************
I came home from a Primary activity on Saturday. Elisabeth was spending quality time with her Papa at home. When I walked in the door, I heard her asking earnestly for a "treat." I walked into the kitchen to find her trying to reach the M&Ms on the counter.
Me: Oh you silly girl. No treats right now.
EB: Mama. Just go. Just go. (as she tries to push me out of the kitchen)

****************************

Elisabeth working on my thesis and telling me to "Just Go, Mama" after I told her that was my computer and not for little girls to play with.

My vote? The one who likes Finland.

2010-01-22T14:26:00.000-08:00

I usually don't watch the late night talk shows. However, if I had to pick one that I would watch, it would be Conan O'Brien's. What sold me on him was his visit to Finland he did three years or so ago and the commentary he gave about attending sauna. (Unfortunately, the only way you can view this is buying it from iTunes.) Apparently, he resembles their president Tarja Halonen and the Finnish people enjoy his show. In fact, he supported Tarja Halonen's re-election this year. I really don't know anything about President Halonen's politics so I can't comment on her. But I can say I like Conan, if only for the fact that he likes Finland.

So, Lance and I agree heartily on this point. Our household will follow you, Conan, wherever you go. I can't guarantee I will watch your show. But I can guarantee we won't be watching Dave's or Jay's.

Our Family 2009

2010-01-21T16:06:00.000-08:00

Our really good friend, Beatta of BmB Photography, took this gorgeous pics of the family in

November 2009.

It was no easy task getting a dog and a toddler to smile and look into the camera. We had a good laugh looking through the proofs. Here are the four that made the cut!

A Morning in the Life

2010-01-21T12:02:00.000-08:00

(of a graduate student, mother, wife, and woman going through secondary infertility)

I had one of those days.

I woke up, got Elisabeth ready to go to the babysitters and then decided to run an quick errand or two while she was away. (Though I should be writing my thesis or doing my internship.) I got to Babies R Us, intending to buy a booster seat so she can start to sit at the table with us, and found out it didn't open until 9:30 a.m.

With 10 minutes to waste, I listened to NPR and their commentary on MA election results, checked my email and tried to get a few minutes of shut-eye, the whole time wishing I would have taken time to change out of my pajama top, find my own jeans instead of my husbands' and put on a little make-up. I think I have let myself go. Just a little.

9:30 a.m. hit and I joined the line of people waiting to be let into the store in the rain. (Seriously, folks. Who waits in line to get into Babies R Us on a Wednesday morning???)

And then it started.

I saw at least ten happy pregnant women shopping for their awaited miracles. I saw racks and racks of tiny baby clothes that Elisabeth can never fit into again. I saw a happy mother with four young children and a round belly selecting a new carseat. I tried to ignore all of this as I focused on getting my TODDLER a big-girl booster seat. And then it hit me. My baby is no longer a baby and I don't know if I will ever be able to visit Babies R Us as an expectant mother or a mother of a small babe again. I held back tears as I rushed to the check out.

9:36 a.m. I was back into my car. By this time, the pity had turned into anger and I drove home, fuming at my (and some of my friends) lot in life. For a second, I hated every woman I saw in that store and every woman who could get pregnant. I was mad. Mad, mad, mad.

9:45 a.m. I walk back into my kitchen and decide I need some spiritual help. I mean, what Christian woman hates her friends, sister-in-laws, and cousins for getting pregnant? I decide to check out some Mormon Messages. I watched this. And then this.

10 a.m. I am sobbing uncontrollably. I am crying for babies I lost. The babyhood of Elisabeth I can never get back. The fear of never having children again. For my friends who still have not been able to have children. I watch the videos over and over again.

10:15 a.m. I am reminded of the message I knew as a young child. Yes, Jesus Love Me. Life can go on. I can hope. God hears my prayers.

10:17 a.m. I start working on the first chapter for my graduate thesis.

12:00 p.m. I fall asleep to the sound of the rain, exhausted from my breakdown.

Sometimes it is hard to see that there is a Plan for ourselves, much bigger than our understanding.
Sometimes, admist being strong and hopeful, it is okay to cry.
Sometimes, and just sometimes, is it okay to be mad.

That is my theory. And I am sticking to it.

Just Say No to Resolutions

2010-01-01T15:20:00.000-08:00

I have decided to take a break from making resolutions this year. I rarely seem to meet all of my resolutions, anyway, and often feel frustrated when I don't. Instead, my goal in 2010 will be to just live life and gracefully handle everything God throws my way.

Here are a few things the Smemoes have in store for us this coming year:

Lance taking and *passing* the patent bar in January. (fingers crossed)
Attending Lance's brother's wedding in Nebraska.
Kristi graduating on May 22, 2010 with her Masters of Science degree.
A romantic five-day get-a-way with just Lance and myself. We hope to find a lucky friend/relative who wants to have Elisabeth stay with them for this time. (Any volunteers? She is a pretty easy child to care for.) We haven't decided on a destination as of yet. My vote is a cruise in the Caribbean.
A visit to MN to see the Amundson clan sometime this summer.
Smock a matching dress for Elisabeth and her cousin for her cousin's baptism.
Attending the blessing of a new nephew and the baptism of our niece in July.
Planning AND attending the Smemoe/Richardson family reunion in August.

August is about as far as we get for plans. I would love to be pregnant again this year but seeing as this is completely out of my control, I will just have to add this to my "wish list" and not my "to do" list. Fingers crossed, hearts prayerful, and dreams hopeful.

Any fun, exciting plan you have for this new year?

We Wish You a Merry Christmas

2009-12-26T11:32:00.000-08:00

And a Happy New Year!

Out of Office Reply

2009-12-03T12:02:00.000-08:00

I will be out of the blogosphere from Thursday, Dec. 3 through Saturday, Dec. 19th due to end-of-semester projects, an internship, and basic Christmas preparations, such as baking goodies, making Elisabeth's dress, and Christmas cards. Be looking in the mail for our annual Christmas letter or check back after the 19th for an update on our family. Hope you have a wonderful two and 1/2 weeks!!!

Kristi

Baby, It's Cold Outside

2009-11-20T19:55:00.000-08:00

Or it will be when we are in MN visiting our family next week. In preparation to embracing the frost-biting cold we will encounter, I borrowed a winter coat for Ellie girl and purchased a bunny hat and mitten set from Target. Elisabeth LOVES her winter gear. She refused to take it off after I tried it on her the other day.

Here she is in one of her favorite places in the house, doing one of her favorite things to do. My dentist will be thrilled that she is already committed to good dental hygiene.

And here she is after I wrestled her out of her coat because it was supposed to be 80 degrees that afternoon. I think she cried for 15 minutes and I could only take off her bunny hat when she was asleep for her nap. I guess this is her way of saying she can't wait to see "Gampa Mimi" and her aunts, uncles and cousins.

Cleanliness

2009-11-16T14:30:00.000-08:00

Elisabeth got herself especially dirty today between lunch and a visit to the park this morning. This is unusual for her. She isn't obsessed with being clean but she always plays and eats pretty neatly. While we were waiting to check out at the fabric store, she looks at me and says loudly "I need bath."

Everyone behind me in line laughed out loud because she did look a little like a street urchin and I probably should have changed her clothes before running some errands. And she does need a bath.

Out of the mouths of babes. . .

Happy Half Birthday to You!

2009-11-16T00:01:00.000-08:00

18 months. Elisabeth has reached the magical age of 18 months. For those that are LDS, this glorious age means that our baby is now old enough to enter into Junior Nursery during the 2nd and 3rd hours of church, allowing mom and pop to actually learn something of a religious nature in Sunday school instead of how to keep a toddler happy and quiet without distracting the 50 other church goers. She did not cry one tear. She doesn't even look back to say goodbye when Lance drops her off and when I pick her up, she doesn't want to leave. That is our social butterfly! Our baby is NOT a baby anymore.

Elisabeth's Medical Report Card:

- Height: 75th percentile

- Weight: 95th percentile

- Head: 60th percentile

Some funny "Elisabethisms":

When we give her a choice between two things, she will say "Ummmm" as she ponders and then does a cute little smack of her lips once she has reached her decision.
She loves salad, eggplant and stuffed peppers. When we put a 1/2 of a stuffed pepper in front of her one night she exclaimed "Oh Yeah!" with a huge grin.
She walks on her toes a lot just like I did when I was a little girl.
She already used her "big girl potty" successfully. We aren't potty training yet but just "familiarizing" her with the concept. She is receptive so far.
Affectionate is word that best describes our clever girl. She is constantly hugging and giving sweet kisses to all of her stuffed animals and baby dolls, not to mention her parents and Sofi Dog.
She loves to do that hand motions to "Itsy Bitsy Spider."
She insists her stuffed dog do everything she does. As a result, her dog went to church last week wearing a diaper and hair bows. She also has her stuffed dog take her turn on the "big girl potty" every night before bedtime.

She is always on the move and is into everything. This picture says it all:

We sure do adore our Chunka Munka!

All in the Family

2009-11-13T00:30:00.000-08:00

Everyone who sees Elisabeth almost automatically says "Oh, she looks just like her dad." I swear she has a little bit of my family in her as well.

You be the judge:

Lance and Elisabeth around 18 months

Kristi and Elisabeth around 18 months

So, she does have a lot of her papa in her. She definitely got her chubs and coloring from her daddy. However, there is no denying she is mine as well. She has my mouth and maybe even my nose!

I think she takes after her namesake, Grandma Dorothy.

No question. She is ours.

Our First Date: A Disagreement

2009-11-02T21:07:00.000-08:00

I claim our first date as a couple was when Lance invited me to go watch the BYU homecoming parade in October 2001. (Which, for the record, it was.) Lance insists it was later in November 2001, when we went to watch a men's acapella group sing and then out to Leatherby's for hamburgers and an icecream sundae. He likes to say that was our first date because he not only held my hand AND told me he loved me, BUT he also gave me my first kiss. He figures he was pretty suave. Even though he is wrong about this being our first date - as it was cleary NOT - I remember that evening every time the calendar on our wall changes from October to November. He told me he loved me 8 years ago on a freezing cold bench outside the HFAC (the performing arts building) at BYU before he had even held my hand.

Right or wrong, I am just so glad he finally stopped trying to set me up with his brother and decided I would be a good match for him.

Here's to a husband who works countless hours to support our family but still manages to spend quality time with our daughter every morning while I sleep in a bit, serve valiantly in his calling at church, take the dog for her morning walk, fold all of our laundry every week, make veggie platters for Sunday dinner at my neighbors, and do everything he can to help out at home so I can finish my graduate degree.

Yup. I would say I am very lucky and forever grateful for the support he has always given me.

AH. . . BOO!

2009-10-30T14:46:00.001-07:00

This is what Elisabeth calls Jack-O-Lanterns for some reason. When she sees them she will shout "AH..BOO!" She can also say her own version of "pumpkin" so I am thinking she bases this name on her Halloween dress.

We attempted to take Elisabeth to the pumpkin patch during Lance's lunch break earlier this week but she wasn't very happy and was scared of the tractors and large crowds of preschool children. I couldn't get her to smile very much that day but at least her pumpkin get-up will make for some nice scrapbook pages. She was pretty smiley after we stopped at Baja Fresh for a lunch. Note to self: Feed the sweet pea BEFORE going to the pumpkin patch. Better luck next year!

Tonight is our ward Trunk-or-Treat and tomorrow we will be carving pumpkins with some good friends before we take our little lamb to go visit some of our neighbors and friends so they can coo over how adorable she is. She will even give you an enthusiastic "Baa" if prompted.

Because I am feeling ambitious. . .

2009-10-25T21:47:00.000-07:00

My newest smocking project:

Originally, I was planning on doing a red dress but after I saw this pattern, I couldn't resist. I mean, Elisabeth is still a baby, right? Babies look better in softer colors. And she won't be our baby for long so I figure there are many years ahead for me to make red dresses. The dress is actually a light pink and my final product will have less puffy sleeves and probably a little different lace. Wish me luck! (Because you all know I don't have anything else to do to fill up my free time!)

I love you always too, Mom.

2009-10-19T23:26:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was straightening out our bookshelf which had become disheveled in the last year in preparation for a baby shower for my dear friend Sam that will be held at my home tomorrow. I came across a book I had forgotten we even owned. The Queen of Cleans Complete Cleaning Guide was a gift to me from my mom soon after I was married. I think it was her way of welcoming me to the "club" of married life, knowing I would need help honing my housekeeping skills that she so desperately tried to instill in me when I was younger. Inside she wrote in her beautiful penmanship that they no longer teach in grade school:

To Kristi
I hope you find many things in here helpful!
Love you always
Mom

After reading this simple phrase, I hugged the book close to my chest with tears rolling down my face. I love you always too, Mom. What a practical gift yet so thoughtful. Thoughtful gifts were her specialty. I inherited my joy of gift giving from her.

I miss my mom with my whole heart every time fall rolls around and I take out my fall decorations. My mom loved each season and always decorated our home for each holiday. I am not sure why fall triggers the aching heart and longing for my mom's company. Maybe it is because I usually bake more and cook more in the fall and it was my mom who taught me how to do both of these things. Baking was our special thing we did together. Every holiday we made something together. Whether it was cupcakes with candy corns on top of decadent icing for Halloween, pies for Thanksgiving, oodles and oodles of goodies at Christmas time, or sugar cookies for Valentine's Day, we always had something we would do together while my dad and brothers were elsewhere.

I remember Christmas time most vividly - falling asleep to the sweet smells of cookies cooking as she stayed up late to finish a batch of something. Every Christmas we had sugar cookies, molasses cookies, "butter balls" (a.k.a. Russian teacakes), cornflake wreaths (my personal favorite), popcorn cake, rosettes, fudge, her famous Heavenly Hash and often a brand new recipe, such as peanut butter blossoms, snowman butter cookies,or spritz cookies. To this day I bake up a storm for every holiday. This is one way I can keep her memory alive. A tradition I can't wait to pass down to Elisabeth. And with Elisabeth's love of food, I am sure she will happily join in the baking fun.

My mom will be gone from this life for five years this coming January. Some days I miss her terribly and I long for her to call me to tell me all about her favorite soap opera, fill me in on the family news, or just to talk about her aches and pains or her newest illness. Lately, I want to talk to her about my struggle to have another baby. She would understand. She would tell me to "SLOW DOWN" and scold me for being too busy. And then, after I would start crying, being that I always have had sensitive feelings, she would tell me how much she loved me and how sorry she was that I was hurting.

My mom and dad at my wedding reception in 2002.

I love you always too, Mom. I miss you forever and can't wait to see you again. I could use one of your squishy hugs every now and then.

12.5

2009-10-03T00:37:00.000-07:00

That is how many pounds I have to lose before I am at my goal weight and how many weeks I have to do it. I lost 2.5 lbs last week, so I feel like I am on my way!

My mission: Lose 12.5 lbs before Christmas and keep it off.

Mission Checklist:
- Exercise at the gym for 60 minutes, three days a week
- Keep a food journal of everything I eat
- Eat sweets very sparingly. Which means I can't keep any in the house.
- Attend Weight Watchers meetings every week. I love WW. It really works!
- Take Elisabeth and the dog for a walk every day.

Wish me luck!

The Journey that Never Ends

2009-09-24T00:15:00.000-07:00

"Life doesn't always turn out the way you plan. I just wish I'd realized at the time, he was talking about MY life."

-Lucy (played by Sandra Bullock) in While You Were Sleeping
* * * * * * * * *

I tend not to bear my heart and soul on this blog. Mainly, I get uncomfortable when others are extremely open with their feelings online so I figure I better keep mine in check as to not inflict the same awkwardness on others. However, I figure I can let things out once in awhile. This is who I am, after all.

Trials. We all have them. We all struggle from time to time. Death, sickness, unemployment, divorce.

My biggest trial is infertility. I thought the day I gave birth to Elisabeth that this trial was officially over. The years of losing babies, expensive infertility treatments, tests and secretly disliking any woman who could get pregnant on their own were over. I was happy to put those dark years behind me and be grateful for the wonderful blessing I now have running through my house, drinking out of the dog dish and saying "No" even when she means yes.

Boy, was I ever wrong. Little did I know after you have one child, you are now graduated to the secondary infertility club. One miscarriage and another failed treatment proves this realization. Elisabeth wasn't the end to my problems having children. She was just a blessed peak in a reproductive life filled with valleys. I have quite a few friends who can't or never were able to have children. I feel so blessed to have the sweet girl I have now. So why the frustration?

I still occasionally grieve for the sweet, naive dreams I had as a newly wed of our six (yes, I wanted six children.) equally spaced children filling our home with happiness. With the rates of IVF and my age slowly creeping past 30, I doubt there will ever be six. I am not even 100% sure there will be more than one. Isn't that silly? Grieving for a dream? Maybe so. Yet, it is who I am.

One thing is for sure. God has a plan for me. I know this with a surety. Will Elisabeth ever have another sibling? I am sure she will. If treatments don't work, adoption is definitely an option. I pray ever day that I can BE STILL and know God is in charge of my life. Just bare with me as we continue on this infertility journey that never ends. . . Some days are hard. Others are better. Yet is is never easy.

Graduate school is my saving grace right now. If I can't be the old woman who lives in a shoe, getting an education in something that I am passionate about is a wonderful alternative. Maybe what I was meant to do all along.

Enough of making myself vunerable. Stay tuned for cute videos and ramblings about the life of a mother/graduate student/wife/dog owner.

Livin' on a Prayer

2009-09-17T16:43:00.000-07:00

Lance likes to make me CDs with "cool" music on them. There is one he made a few months ago in my car that I listen to almost every day. These eclectic CDs include an varied mix - for example The Beach Boys, Jason Mraz, The Mormon Tabernacle choir, The Red Hot Chili Peppers and Harry Conick Jr. are all on this particular CD. I often skip over songs of which I am not fond or not really in the mood to hear- such as Bon Jovi's Livin' on a Prayer.

Today I skipped to the next track when I heard the first strains of Livin' on a Prayer. Elisabeth started to freak out - waving her hands and saying "no, no, no."

Me: What? Do you want to listen to the song?

Elisabeth: (nods her head "yes.")

I turned back to the Bon Jovi song and my baby girl proceeded to ROCK OUT to this song. She even sang along to the "Whoa...Whoa. . Livin' on prayer" part as she rocked back and forth in her car seat and then nodded her head in time to the song. I wish I wasn't driving and had my camera.

I decided I need to make my own CD so I can persuade her to give up this odd obsession with 80s music. One 80s music lover in the family is all I can take.

Of Beagles and Babies

2009-09-14T20:13:00.000-07:00

I love our dog. . . I love how she snores in her sleep, has a need to be in the same room with one of us at all times, plays tug of war with Elisabeth, and sighs when she is displeased with something. She is the most loving and adoring dog I have ever met.

But, there are times when I dislike our dog. I dislike how she digs after the mole in our backyard, creating her own little irrigation ditch. I dislike how she constantly is jumping up to the counter or Elisbeth's highchair to steal food. I dislike how she has a need to bury things in the back yard, dig them up a month or so later, and then hide them in any blanket she can find.

Tonight I have decided I definitely dislike her as much as I love her. I was sitting in the comfy rocking chair in my bedroom, reading Elisabeth her bedtime stories, when in runs our dog, desperate to get on our bed. After four struggling attempts to make the jump from our floor to the bed, Sofi finally makes it. She then heads straight our pillows, which I notice are stacked on top of each other as to form a tent like structure. Sofi begins to pull each layer of this tent off with her teeth until she uncovers what is obviously her treasure.

Great. She brought in some filthy, mud-laden bone from the backyard and buried it under my pillows. I was pretty sure I was going to kill her. Not wanting interrupt the bedtime routine, I make an attempt to ignore my dog nosing around for her goody. However, I noticed that the dog is not grabbing a bone and scampering away, like usual. Instead, she is going in, taking a bite of something very chewy and coming up for air. Images of the grossest thing imaginable (like some feces from the backyard that we forgot to pick up) race through my mind and I decide I have to intervene. As soon as I stand up to go see what is happening, Sofi lunges for the rest of whatever it is and bolts. There, in her mouth, is something at least a foot long. From where I stood, it looked like a huge piece of fungus or a piece of rotting wood from a fence. Of course I am not fast enough to catch the little scoundrel but after some investigation, discover my bed smells like wet yeast.

Then it dawns on me - The loaf of lingonberry bread my friends delivered yesterday was suspiciously missing from the MIDDLE of my dining room table. Yes, folks. Sometime between 4- 7:00 p.m. tonight, my dog jumped on the table, found the bread, ripped the ziplock bag off the bread and buried it under my pillows and sheets for safekeeping. Gotta love this dog.

So, after putting an exhausted baby to bed, changing my sheets, finding the dog and scolding her loud enough so my neighbors could hear, and putting off my homework to write this blog post, I decided I could give this dog away for a week. Maybe even a month.

Only her baby sister loves her too much. I can't imagine how Elisabeth would get through her days without having her pup to pet and love. And, if I dig down into my heart, I realize I feel the same.

Sofi - you are one spoiled and lucky dog.

Elisabeth giving Sofi "loves."

Move over Beethoven

2009-09-12T09:07:00.000-07:00

Isn't she talented? Enthusiastic as well. I have a feeling we will be doing dance & piano lessons in a few years.

Sweet Tooth

2009-09-12T00:25:00.000-07:00

As I was preparing to head to the pool for a swim this afternoon, it occurred to me that it was a little too quiet in our house - home to a busy toddler who often babbles and jabbers as she plays. Following my maternal instinct, I quickly ran out to the kitchen to see what Elisabeth was doing. I noticed the pantry door ajar and when I peeked around the counter, this amusing sight met my eyes:

In case you are having a hard time deciphering what it is our daughter is doing, allow me to explain. Here is our swimsuit honey, helping herself to fistfuls of powdered sugar. We actually only let her have sugar on occassion (come on - you know Chunka Munka doesn't need the extra empty calories when she eats heartily at every meal) but now I know our little girl has a sweet tooth. I scolded her half-heartedly and this is the look she gave me:

It is as though she is saying "Yummy. You should try some, Mama!"

After I took the box away and washed the sticky fingers of a sobbing little girl, I immediately called her Papa to relay the story, share some laughs and offer an ultimatum; Install childproof locks on our pantry door by noon tomorrow or no BYU football game until they are installed. Before you think I am a demading wife, let me reassure you this is not the first request. I have caught Elisabeth walking around the house on many occassions, eating from our raisin bran cereal box . My guess is it can only get worse from here. Good thing she didn't find the chocolate chips!

I feel so lucky to have this little rascal to brighten my days.

Remember

2009-09-11T10:20:00.001-07:00

"Where there is pain, there is still feeling and where there's feeling, there's hope."
- Nicholas Evans, The Horse Whisperer

*****************************************
I spent some time this morning watching the coverage of the 9/11 Memorial at Ground Zero in New York. As all of the names of those lost in the attacks on 9/11/01 were being read off by family members, I couldn't help but cry myself. Though I didn't know anyone personally that was lost that day or in the war that followed, I do know what it is like to experience personal loss and heartache and my own tender heart mourns with those that mourn today.

My friend Lindsay made this post on her blog that I wanted to share. Lindsay is always better with words than I am and she penned the sentiments in my heart better than I could. Though my patriotism is not always apparent, I am so grateful to be a member of this country and to have the freedoms we have.

Let's us always remember to have hope.

Ready or not

2009-08-24T10:59:00.001-07:00

My bed is full of laundry to be folded, my sink full of dishes to wash, my living room scattered with toys, and my car in desperate need of a cleaning. My baby is in bed taking her nap and I am reluctantly opening up my new syllabi for this semester that starts today while taking a few moments to post to my blog.

Ready or not, my 4th and 2nd to last semester for the MSIDT program starts today. I have "senioritis" pretty bad. Having successfully survived the semester this summer, I keep asking myself - Is this worth it? Are the late nights of homework and weekends spent glued to my laptop while my husband and daughter spend time together really worth it? Do I really want to continue? Attending park days, smocking dresses for Elisabeth, baking cookies, planting a garden and scrapbooking sounds so much more appealing.

However, I only have two semesters left. I can do this. I can finish my masters. Besides, I made a promise to Lance to finish AND I would hate the thousands of tuition dollars and hard work over the last few years to go to waste. And despite the stress associated with being a fulltime student, mother and wife, I secretly love what I am studying and enjoy being in school at times.

So, ready or not, here I come. I guess the laundry will have to wait.

Tradition!

2009-08-23T21:12:00.001-07:00

Lance took me to see Topol in Fiddler on the Roof yesterday. Despite having to sit in our $50 nose bleed seats, the performance was absolutely amazing. I wish we had a set of opera glasses as we missed so much of the facial expressions that made the play as engaging as it was. Despite this, we laughed, cried, clapped, and sang with everyone else there. We are in the process of teaching Elisabeth some of the songs. "The Dream" is a great splashing, bathtime song. She will love show tunes before we know it!

I adore musicals and wish we could afford to attend the theater on a regular basis. After singing "Tradition" on the way to get frozen yogurt, we decided we need to make theater a part of our own family's traditions. We decided we will attend at least one musical or play every year. When Elisabeth is old enough - Maybe 8 or 9, she will start attending musicals with us.

Here is a record of what we have seen as a family so far:

Fiddler on the Roof - 2009
Wicked - 2008
The Pagaent of the Masters - 2008
Les Miserables - 2006
Holes - 2005
Walter Wonka and the Lawyer Factory - 2004 (A musical put on by the law students at the U of MN Law School).
A handful of musical and theater performances done at BYU in 2002. Unfortunately, neither one of us remembers what we saw but Lance got free tickets while we were undergrads so we know we saw quite a few!

We are thinking we may get tickets to see The Lion King in 2010. Do you have suggestions of what would be a good play to add to our wish list?

Spontaneity

2009-08-15T00:19:00.000-07:00

There is nothing more exhilarating than having a two week break between graduate school semesters. Breaks allow me to catch up on housework, spend more time playing with Elisabeth, watch movies I missed during the semester and break out of my routine and be spontaneous. Spontaneous. Now that is an understatement.

I feel like a giddy college freshman who has a new sense of freedom after finishing my last final. For example, when I heard about "Fiddler on the Roof" playing in town, I purchased two tickets for the last showing on a whim. Lance and I have plans to take at least three evenings to go to Disneyland while a babysitter watches Elisabeth. I took Elisabeth and Sofi to the dog park and we watched Sofi frolic with the other dogs for at least an hour.

I dread opening up my box of text books to prepare for next semester. I cross my fingers in hopes that these last two semesters are not as painful as I fear and that my next two week break will arrive quickly.

Bilingual Baby

2009-08-02T21:01:00.001-07:00

Lance: Do you want me to help you brush your teeth, Elisabeth?
Elisabeth: Apua (Finnish for "help")

Amazing how a 14 month old girl can learn another language in six short weeks. Especially since she barely knows English!

Loves Music, Loves to Dance

2009-07-25T21:44:00.000-07:00

Elisabeth loves to sing, to listen to music and loves to dance. Notice her fancy footwork. Usually she just wiggles in time to the music but today she pulled out the steps.

Apparently she digs David Archuleta.

Also notice I don't know how to use the camera properly.

From the mouths of babes

2009-07-12T23:58:00.000-07:00

Elisabeth is slowly improving her verbal skills. She will sometimes say a word clearly one day and then never to repeat it for weeks and weeks. Every word she uses is purposeful and her vocabulary is growing more and more everyday. Thanks to our long-time Finnish visitors (who will have been at our house for a total of six weeks when they leave) she is also becoming bilingual.

Here are some of the things she says on a regular basis:

Mama
Dog
anna ("give me" in Finnish)
ei ("no" in Finnish)
kiitos ("thank you" in Finnish)
eeese (her version of "please")
hes (her version of "yes")
nana (you guessed it. . . "banana")
Dada
all done
gampa ("grandpa")
gamma ("grandma")
ny-ny ("good night")
up
baak ("book")
Nona (her babysitter)
woof woof (actually, her bark sounds more of a soft grunt - hmmm, hmmm)
choo-choo (everytime she hears the train go by our house)
uh oh
hi

She can sign "more", "please," "thank you," "eat," and "all done." As you can guess from her round cheeks, she signs "eat" quite often through the day. This one sure loves to eat!

The most recent phrase to come out of our little music lover's mouth was "do it again" after we were done singing a hymn at church today. Lance and I couldn't believe we heard her say this.

About a two months ago, Lance brought her in to our bedroom for her morning feeding (As of July 5th, she is officially weaned, however.) She started to eat and then stopped, looked up into my eyes and said as clear as clear can be "Hi Mama." She then proceeded to return to her feeding. Talk about melting my heart! I regret to say she hasn't done that since.

She also loves to "sing" along to songs she loves while we are driving in the car. This repertoire includes "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star," "The Wheels on the Bus," anything Disney and Starship's "We Built this City."

I cherish these simple moments with her amidst the stress and busy-ness of life in graduate school.

Grad School FAQs

2009-06-14T00:39:00.001-07:00

1. What are you studying at school?

I am enrolled in the Masters of Instructional Design and Technology at Cal State Fullerton. I am learning good instructional design concepts so I can design learning materials, online courses, training programs, educational software, etc. You name it. I am also learning how to program educational software in Flash. My desire is to work as a consultant some day to help schools, businesses, and non-profit organizations transfer courses to an online environment without having to work at a full-time job.

2. When do you graduate? How much time do you have left?

I graduate (God willing) in May 2010. I have three more semesters total until I graduate and I am halfway through one of those three.

3. You are a fairly new mom with a husband who is at work more than 40 hours a week. How do you find the time to be a student?

This is TOUGH. Very, Very, Very Tough. My goal is to be a loving mother and wife, first and foremost. Then comes my role as a student. I only do homework when Elisabeth is asleep or happily engaged with her Papa or another good friend. This means LOTS of late nights and all-day Saturday homework fests. I usually go to bed around 2 a.m. at least once a week. Basically, I do homework in every free second I can.

4. If you are studying all the time, who takes care of the things around the house?

I still try to do as much as I can. Whatever I can not finish, my dear, supportive husband picks up the slack. I think he has folded more laundry, given more baths to the baby, ran more errands to the grocery store and spend more time with Elisabeth on Saturdays than he ever imagined was possible. I couldn't love him anymore than I do now. He is gift from heaven.

5. Why are you doing this again?

Trust me when I say this thought has crossed my mind at least once a day for the last 7 weeks. Going to graduate school as a mother is more difficult than anything I have ever done in my life. Our family has had to make many sacrifices so I could return to school. Is this worth it? I am not sure. But I do know I felt prompted by the Holy Spirit to start graduate school in the Fall of 2007. I also know I need to keep the promise I made to my husband when I registered for classes in 2007. He promised to support me through graduate school as long as I promised to see it through to the end.

Getting a masters in education has always been a lifelong goal of mine. I love learning and attending school more than a normal human-being should and amongst all the stress and huge projects, I actually enjoy what I am studying and can't wait to apply it to my life.

With only one sweet and well-behaved one year old at home and dreams of giving her three more brothers or sisters, it is now or never. Will it be worth it? I pray every day that Heavenly Father will give me the strength and insight into this journey of faith.

Seek learning, even by study and also by faith. D&C 88:118

It's My Party. . .

2009-06-10T14:25:00.000-07:00

And I can cry if I want to. And did she ever.

Happy 1st Birthday Miss Elisabeth!

Elisabeth wasn't quite sure what to think of her ladybug cake and her candle.

Get that thing away from me Papa!

Homemade banana cupcakes are much tastier. Elisabeth wouldn't put it down - in fact, we we worried she wasn't able to breathe with the cupcake in front of her face. We had to pry the cupcake wrapper out of her hands.

A temporary hiatus

2009-05-13T23:37:00.000-07:00

Homework, homework, homework in graduate school. Family visiting. Volunteering as the registration chair at the RESOLVE Adoption Conference this weekend. Giving a talk on Sunday with only four days notice. Helping to plan a fun missionary Primary activity. A cute 1 year old who loves attention.

7 reasons why I still have not posted Easter, Elisabeth's birthday, my dad's and brother's visit and her 1 year old update.

We are doing everything we possibly can to keep you updated on our progress. Please try again later.

Elisabeth enjoying her first taste of sugar at her cousin's birthday party in April.

American Girl

2009-04-27T21:11:00.000-07:00

Today I received my first ever American Girl catalog in the mail. I am assuming this company received my information because I gave birth to a baby girl about a year ago and now they are adding me to their pool of possible costumers.

Instead of doing my laundry and cleaning out our office in preparation for Grandpa Mickie and Uncle Jeremy to come, I spend my afternoon pouring over this catalog. I can't wait until the day Elisabeth decides she wants one of these dolls. Or that she wants to go the American Girl store in L.A. to take her doll to tea. I hope her first choice is this.

We have been talking seriously about not spoiling our little girl and the need to teach her frugality and the life-important lesson that sometimes it is better to not get what you want. We are doing our part to go green and live providently. However, if Elisabeth wants one of these dolls, I know I will get her one. Why? Because I want one. Only I am too old to purchase something like this in good conscience.

So, Elisabeth can wear clothes I buy at garage sales and receive gently-used Craig's List finds for her birthday. (Her birthday present she will receive next week will be a pre-owned rocking horse.) But, I will happily indulge an American Girl whim every once in awhile. At full price. And I may purchase something for my daughter as well.

Numbers

2009-04-22T21:32:00.000-07:00

What's happening in our lives? Let me count the ways:

23 - # of hours we drove in a car to visit Lance's family in UT

Go BYU Cougars!!

15 - # of days until Elisabeth's first birthday. Where did the time go?

12 - # of pounds I have left to loose before I am at my goal weight...I can fit into my skinny jeans again!

11 - # of months we have had our sweet baby girl in our lives.

Elisabeth at 11 months with her lamby

8 - # of days before I return to graduate school to finish my MS degree.

7 - # of nephews we have in our family now. Welcome Joshua!

5 - # of days Elisabeth and I got to spend with my sweet nephews, my

brother & sis-in law in WV this past week.

Elisabeth with her cousins, Alex & Andrew.

My family sure can create some adorable offspring!

4 - # of times Lance has played the Wii Fit game he got for his 29th birthday

2 - # of pounds Sofi has left to loose. Who would have known beagles can be overweight?

1 - # of packages of Peeps that Sofi stole, ate and tried to "bury" in our leather sofa.

Purging

2009-04-13T20:11:00.000-07:00

My house has been in the "as soon as I can get to it" state for many months now. I have boxes of stuff piled in many rooms in the house, waiting for the moment for me to go through their contents and either find a home for the items in my house, sell them on Craig's List, or give them away. As Elisabeth's 1st birthday looms in front of me along with a huge wave of visitors this summer, I figured it is now or never.

So, purge, purge away! I LOVE SPRING CLEANING!

Warning: My posts will still be few and far between. Thanks for your patience as I put my life in order. My family sorely needs this to happen for all of our sanities!

Dispelling Rumors

2009-04-08T10:46:00.001-07:00

I realize my frequency of posting has decreased significantly as of late. Just to dispel any rumors, I thought I should let everyone know that I am *not* pregnant. Someone emailed me to ask if the reason I wasn't posting was due to morning sickness. Sorry! (Though, I wish that were the case.)

I blame my lack of blogging on my new calling as the Primary secretary in our new ward (our ward boundaries were redrawn), a new smocking project for Elisabeth, my gym membership, and the beautiful spring weather.

I have many postings in my head, however, and hope to transfer them to my blog soon. Thanks for your patience! Here is a video of our two girls in the meantime.

Marriage Contracts

2009-04-07T20:14:00.000-07:00

I was kinda hoping that the parents of either of these two boys would like to enter into a marriage contract with us to marry our daughter. These boys sure are handsome and have fun dispositions. Any takers Lindsay or Amanda? I think either young man would make a great match. More importantly, their parents would make spectacular in-laws!

As part of our mini-trip to UT this past weekend, (more about this later...) we were able to spend time with some good friends. I was happy to meet up with Lindsay and Amanda again outside of the cyber world (I religiously follow their blogs), and meet their little guys.

I love how the Lord brings people into our lives. I feel the need to publicly state that I am so grateful to have Dave and Nancy N. and their ever-growing brood (of which the handsome babies above are the newest members) be a part of our lives. Nancy took me under her wing when I was a shy, nervous fledgling at BYU and became a surrogate aunt to me, offering a listening ear and help whenever I needed it. Her family became my family and I will never forget her kindness! She was the person to which I gave giddy updates about my blossoming relationship with Lance and was one of the first people to find out about my official engagement. I admire Nancy and LOVE her, her significant other, her children and grandchildren.

Thanks for letting us share some ice cream, goldfish, conversation, and friendship Sunday night!

Music to our ears

2009-03-18T09:59:00.000-07:00

I think sleep training is the hardest thing about being a parent so far. Nothing stresses me out more than getting my baby to take good naps without it being a traumatic experience for both of us. Elisabeth needs her naps to function properly.

There were a few months where she wouldn't go down for a nap without crying. I persisted in forcing naps upon her even though my anxiety levels were quite high through the whole process. No one likes hearing their baby cry in protest for 10-20 minutes before the little one finally drifts off into the land of nod.

Just a few weeks ago she started to go down for a nap without a fuss and with a big smile on her face. She has replaced her crying with something much more enjoyable - singing! Elisabeth sings herself to sleep for her naps. I started putting on some quiet kid's music and giving her a small doll to hold in her crib. Apparently the combination of these two things make her happy enough to sing away until she finally gives in to sleep.

How cute is that?

A little discretion, please

2009-03-10T21:08:00.000-07:00

Today I stopped at a semi-fast food restaurant to pick up dinner as I had a church meeting to attend and wasn't able to make dinner. While I was waiting for them to make my kabobs, a very nice and slender woman kept smiling at me and looking at me with tenderness. I couldn't figure out what her problem was until this dredded question spilled out of her mouth:

"How far along are you?"

What?!?! How far along am I? Nevermind the fact that I am actually below my pre-pregnancy weight and can fit into the majority of my clothes again. Apparently, I must have always looked pregnant.

My reply was a terse "I am not pregnant."

Her face turned a wonderful shade of red and she looked as though she was going to throw up. Good. You should be embarrassed lady. Next time keep your small talk to yourself or use a little discretion. How depressing! Now I think I am going to open up one of our forbidden boxes of Girl Scout cookies and have a few - maybe the whole box.

Heck - If I look pregnant, I might as well stop depriving myself of the simple tasty things in life.

On Cloud Nine

2009-03-01T19:36:00.000-08:00

A lot can change in nine months:

Elisabeth, Papa and Puppy - 2 days old.

Elisabeth, Papa and Puppy - Exactly 9 months old

Major nine-month milestone: Stood up on her own after her nap on her 9 month birthday.

Another milestone: Elisabeth waves "hi" and "bye"

She went from being in the 95th percentile for weight to the 75th percentile. I like this change, though she is still our Chunka Munka.

Our curious little explorer is crawling all over like a little speed demon, constantly using the "more" sign in sign-language at the dinner table (there is NOTHING this baby won't devour), saying "mama," "dada," "oh-oh," "na na" (her word for no), "Nona" (the nickname of her babysitter) as though she really knows what she is saying, and filling our home with happy giggles everyday. She still has her non-perfect moments when have to resort to calling her by her first and middle name, but we can't help but love our little girl. (Who will actually be 10 months this week. I am a little behind with this post!)

Old Fashioned Girl

2009-02-16T15:32:00.001-08:00

Here is the finished product:

I have to admit I am fairly proud of this hand-made frock. I feel like I could pluck Elisabeth off of the leather couch in our living room and place her on a settee in an antique store and she would fit right in with the other vintage goods. Someone at church suggested I make these types of dresses to sell. Sorry folks. This labor of love is way too time consuming and expensive of a hobby to make it worth the price someone would pay me. For now, Miss Elisabeth and her future siblings will be the only ones to don my hand-crafted finery. I may be willing to make a smocked article of clothing for a favorite niece or nephew, though. ;-)

Note: There was a smudge on my camera lens when I took these photos so they appear a tad blurry.

Dixie Lives

2009-02-13T21:04:00.000-08:00

While browsing for a book on Greek mythology in the history section at a local Borders, my eyes were drawn to a bright green paperback with a black and white picture of a surly, odd-looking confederate soldier on the cover, bearing the obscure title; Confederates in the Attic: Dispatches from the Unfinished Civil War. Something about this book called to me. On an impulse, I purchased the book, curious to see what stories about humanity were captured between the two covers.

The South and their role in the Civil War has always intrigued me. I had gone to visit my penpal in Lousiana over spring break my senior year. I tagged along with my friend to her classes since my friend was *not* on spring break. When one of her teachers asked where I was from, I heard some snickers throughout her classroom and a boy shout out in disgust "So you're a Yankee!?!" I was very confused. We studied the Civil War in school but that is where us "Northerners" interests in the war ended. My friend then kindly informed me that some people in the South were still upset about loosing the war. In fact, some people were still fighting the war in their hearts.

I started reading the book yesterday and haven't been able to put it down. The author decides to tour the South and write sort of an ethnography about the people and situations he encounters - from attending a Daughters of the Confederacy birthday party for Robert E. Lee to marching in an authentic reinactment of Gettysburg, Tony Horwitz opens up a world that us "Northerners" could never understand.

Here is just a small taste:

The War of Northern Agression had little to do with slavery. Rather, it was a culture war in which Yankees imposed their imperialist and capitalist will on the agrarian South, just as the English had done wo the Irish and Scots--and as America did to the Indians...

Amazing how history changes with the eyes that view it.

Stylin'

2009-02-09T10:27:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Auntie J, Uncle R and cousin Nick, Elisabeth is stylin' in her new Ralph Lauren dress and belt. I couldn't resist the striped tights. The nice thing about this dress is she can easily crawl in it as well. Some of our friends insist that Elisabeth is going to be a girly-girl who likes girl things and loves to wear dresses. I can only hope she takes after me because it is sure fun to dress her up!

When You're the Best of Friends

2009-02-08T20:34:00.001-08:00

We love our Sofi Dog.

We love our Ellie Beth.

We love that they love each other.

Weekly Eval

2009-02-02T15:47:00.000-08:00

Finish smocking Elisabeth's dress. Check.

Finish sewing Elisabeth's dress. Check minus. (I still have to put the snaps and hook/eye on. As soon as I officially finish the dress, I will post a picture!)

Wow. These weekly goals really did keep me from idling my time away!

Goals for this week:

Pick out a pattern for Elisabeth's Easter dress.
Make Elisabeth's baby food. (I hear it is cheaper and not to mention healthier. I thought I would give it a try! Thank you Mary M. for letting me borrow the Super Baby Food book and the baby-food-making utensils.)
Update my display board with a Valentinesy display.

Eight is Great

2009-01-20T15:13:00.000-08:00

Our little girl is already eight months old. I get sad thinking how fast these past eight months has gone and realize our little baby won't be a baby much longer. I am keeping a journal for her where I write down monthly how much she has grown, her developmental milestones, our feelings about her and any cute things she has done that make her unique.

Here is a sampling of her 8 month progress report:

Elisabeth chortles whenever she sees, tastes or does something she likes. Our house is filled with little "Ha ha!" laughs throughout the day.
Elisabeth gets really excited when her Papa comes home from work and rewards him with a squeal of delight and arms that flap up and down in elation.
She loves to read books. She especially loves when we make sound effects for animals or change our voices with different characters.
Elisabeth is VERY particular about her likes and dislikes. When we have story time, often she will peer over the book we are reading at the time at another book on the floor. This is her way of indicating to us she would rather read the other book.
Elisabeth's play is very focused and intense, filled with curiosity. One of her favorite pasttimes is to take the DVDs off of the bookshelf. While doing so, she stops to scrutinize every DVD case before gently pushing it aside. She has also figured out how to dump out her toys from their boxes - even ones that are tightly sealed.
Sofi the Beagle is her best friend and vice versa. Just yesterday I came into the living room to witness Sofi piling all of her squeaky toys and balls into Elisabeth's lap. Sofi then sat next to the baby, cocked her head like she does to us, and barked at the baby to play fetch with her. Elisabeth rewards Sofi by patting her fur and pulling on her collar. Sofi especially loves when Elisabeth will reach down her hands from her highchair after dinner so that Sofi can help her wash the baby food off. We should really stop this but when Elisabeth giggles uncontrollably as Sofi licks her, we can't help but smile and overlook this behavior.
Elisabeth is already communicating in her own way. She has said "Mama" once while looking directly at me (does this count for her first word?) and usually adds a few "mamas" in her cries, says "na na na" whenever she is done or doesn't want to do something (like go to bed) and likes to make a buzzing sound when she is playing.
Elisabeth is officially a crawler! Though she prefers the "army crawl", she has started to crawl normally on all fours and is always on the move.

Productive Free Time

2009-01-20T10:18:00.000-08:00

Lance asked me on Sunday, after a very busy weekend, if I remembered what it was like to have free time. After laughing, I tried to find an answer for him. The truth is we do have free time, though it is a considerably smaller amount than we had before Elisabeth was born. We just feel like we don't have free time becuase we are usually so exhausted by the time our "free" time rolls around that we piddle it away by either searching the web, sending emails, or watching TV.

I decided I needed to make the most of my free time in 2009 by being more productive with the time I have. Gone are the days of watching House re-runs on TV or seeing what good deals I can get on Craigslist.com or eBay. I am going to use my free time to create and organize. Hopefully, I will just be making our lives better than they already are.

To help keep myself accountable for this goal, I plan on recording on my blog my goals for the week. Maybe you will all find it interesting to see what I am up to these days and I hope these publically stated goals will encourage me to actually complete them. Here goes!

My goal this week: Finish smocking Elisabeth's dress that I have been working on since the beginning of December. I am so close!

Next week's goal: Finish sewing the dress I smocked this week.

Wish me luck!

Happy Belated Holidays!

2009-01-19T10:05:00.001-08:00

I made a goal in 2009 to be more productive with my time throughout the day. As a result, my time spent on the computer has diminished to a bare minimum and I have not accomplished my usual computer tasks, such as blogging and downloading pictures. Though the Christmas decorations are long since packed away, I figured you all wanted to know of some 2008 holiday high and low lights of our small family:

HIGHLIGHTS:

We saw both my family and most of Lance's family for the holidays.
I lost four pounds over the holiday season and am only five pounds away from my pre-pregnancy weight.
Elisabeth loved opening presents.
Elisabeth was able to meet some of her relatives she hasn't met before.
We had Andy's Frozen Custard THREE times in four days.
Lance as able to play his new game, Puerto Rico, a few times with his brothers.

LOWLIGHTS:

All three of us got a stomach virus in MO and managed to pass it along to the 12+ people staying at Lance's mom's home.
Elisabeth and I then managed to bring this horrible sickness to both OK and MN - leaving at least nine people vomiting in 2009, thus me earning the nickname of "Typhiod Kristi" as I no longer felt sick but got everyone sick no mater where we went.
E.B. and I had to fly on SIX flights between Christmas day and the first week in January. One flight took us through Chicago(which, if you didn't know, it is always a bad idea to fly through Chicago in the winter). We won't be doing that again. Ever.

Elisabeth hanging out with her Aunt Lea at Grandma Bev's home. Before she got her sick. :-)

SNOW BUNNIES! Elisabeth with her cousins Tera and Adrianna. The temperature stayed above zero while we were in MN, so that was a plus!

Elisabeth opening gifts on Christmas morning. She loved to eat the wrapping

paper.

Our Christmas Eve angel. We were so thankful for the Christmas miracles in our lives this past Christmas. For the sweet baby girl we have in our home, for the family we were able to see and for the chance to celebrate the birth of our Savior as a family.

Mars and Venus

2008-12-17T22:52:00.000-08:00

I wrote the following list for Lance on Saturday when I sent him out to do errands.

Target
Return sheets
1 roll of children's wrapping paper and
1 pkg. of tissue paper

Hallmark
Exchange ornament
4 baby's first Christmas picture frame ornament

Lance's shopping trip to Target was successful yet he came home with a HUGE bag from Hallmark. At first I thought he had purchased me a sentimental present. However, I was shocked when he pulled out four identical Baby's First Christmas ornaments from the bag.* Why in the world would I want four units of the same ornament?

Taking the advice from Elder Wirthlin, we laughed until we cried. If husbands could only read our minds.

*For those who suffer from the same misguided interpretation skills as Lance: I intended him to exchange the ornament "for" a baby's first Christmas picture frame ornament.

Grounded from eBay

2008-12-15T22:13:00.000-08:00

I have a sickness. I LOVE shoes. I have more pairs of shoes than I could possibly need but I love to find a pair that is just "me" and add it to my collection. I haven't boughten shoes for myself since June 2008 in an effort to be more frugal.

However, Elisabeth's shoe closet has been feeding my addiction. Heaven forbid she wears a pair of shoes that do not match her outfit. And she has to have two pairs of dress shoes - one black patent leather and one brown. Nevermind that she can't even walk yet and is still weeks away from all out crawling. Her toes need to be covered.

My favorite shoes for her feet are Pedipeds. UNBELIEVABLY expensive shoes for a baby but very high quality craftmanship and fit her chubby little feet perfectly. My friend gave me a pair in a box of hand-me downs and it has been my mission ever since to procure cheap used pairs for her future use.

Just today I purchased THREE pairs of gently used Pediped shoes in pristine condition for an average of $9.00 a pair from eBay. Shucks - You can't even find a decent pair of Target baby shoes for that price. Here is what one of the pairs looks like:

I can't wait for her to sport these in public. But, in the meantime, I am grounding myself from eBay. I may be saving close to $20 on a pair of shoes but I am spending money on non-necessary items. I have to admit Elisabeth does not *need* shoes AND I need to be more of sensible with my purchases and save my money up for more important things. Like a house. Oh, how difficult it is to exercise self-constraint when it comes to shopping for a baby girl. Yet , how important for me to start now so my daughter can learn important life lessons about frugality.

A Very Merry Half Birthday

2008-12-01T11:13:00.000-08:00

Six months. Our baby girl is now six months. We have been floored at how much she has grown and developed in the past few weeks. Here are just a few of her newest tricks that make me feel like we no longer hold an infant in our arms but a baby girl who is growing up way too quickly:

Can hold her own bottle.
Eats three meals of solids a day - rice cereal and fruit for breakfast, fruit/veggies for lunch and meat/vegetable for dinner.
Drinks water from a cup
Started officially teething and has her two bottom front-teeth to prove it
Can "scoot" like a little worm across the floor

Started taking swimming lessons

No longer wants to be rocked to sleep. Prefers to be put in her crib with her soothie blankie and fall asleep on her own.

Give us kisses on our cheeks (Okay, she actually chews on our cheeks when we ask her to give kisses, but close enough for go, right?)

Grandma Bev says Elisabeth is the happiest baby she has ever taken care of. Beth's big smiles and giggle are pretty contagious. She does have her occassional "mental breakdowns" (as her papa calls them) and fussy times but is usually happy-go-lucky. Life would not be the same without our little ladybug who loves music, singing, reading books and pulling the puppy's ears.

1/2 pound

2008-11-29T15:08:00.000-08:00

I am currently a Weight Watchers member and was dreading my weigh-in this morning after a week of eating five course dinners and elaborate breakfasts on a cruise ship AND after eating a large, home cooked Thanksgiving meal that included all the butter-laden fixins' imaginable. I am ecstatic to report I lost 1/2 lb. Most people gain weight on cruises and after the holidays.

I have never, ever been more excited to loose a 1/2 lb. in my life. Whoo hoo!

Mullet-be-gone

2008-11-28T08:34:00.000-08:00

Elisabeth was blessed with a full head of beautiful hair from birth. For some reason, the back of her hair started to grow faster than her sides, resulting in something similar to a "mullet." I finally couldn't stand this 80's hairdo and took a pair of scissors to remedy the situation.

Miss Mullet

After she was de-mulletfied

Our very own little Cindy Lou Who.

H-A-Double L- O- W- Double E -N

2008-11-27T18:14:00.000-08:00

Our family on Halloween. Sofi was a pumpkin this year.

We carved pumpkins for the first time as a married couple this year.

My pumpkin seeds turned out quite tasty.

We went trick-or-treating to two houses in our neighborhood. Our neighbors gave Sofi a special treat.

Our little pumpkin and her papa.

Ladybug, ladybug. Elisabeth was a ladybug this year and was sure cute.

Swing Voter

2008-11-06T10:51:00.000-08:00

With great emotion, I happily bid this election season farewell. I am curious to see what Obama does in office... for better or worse. I am also relieved Prop 8 passed, as we were heavily involved with this grassroots movement. Regardless of how anyone voted, I am sure most people can agree with me that this election season was one historic and emotionally intense time.

Sadly, I have decided that I must gracefully withdraw my political registration as a Democrat. There is such a disparity between my conservative social views and the Democrat party that I feel like being a card carrying member doesn't quite fit anymore. Being a Democrat here in CA is A LOT different than being a member of the Democratic-Farmer-Laborer party in MN.

But, before all of you GOPers holler for joy that you won a Democrat over to your side, I must admit I can never be a registered Republican either. Those that know me well will also attest to the fact that I do *not* see eye-to-eye with the Republican party either. I will join my husband as being a completely independant voter - voting according to my conscience for who I think will be the best candidate for the job. And luckily, the Democratic party will still allow me, as a "decline to state" party member, to vote in their primaries.

I was listening to NPR today and am excited to hear that this decision - to become an independent voter - has made me a "swing voter." All parties will have to do their part to win my vote. I may have lost my "Minnesota Democrat" identity but have gained a new one of the "Swing Voter."

Table Manners

2008-10-26T22:38:00.000-07:00

We took this as a sign that Ellie B was ready to start on solids.

She wasn't too sure of her rice cereal at first.

Now she can't get enough and wants to lick the bowl clean.

When is it too early to teach table manners? :-)