Picture Proof

MSIDT Graduation from Cal State University, Fullerton

May 22, 2010

Exhaustion

Graduation is tomorrow.  I can't figure out why everyone else seems much more excited about my graduation than me.  Then it occurred to me - I am just plain exhausted and don't have much energy to celebrate.  Between running after a determined toddler who has been out of her sleep schedule (meaning we get less sleep), to being 21 weeks pregnant, to trying to catch up on housework we have let go over the past year, to figuring out when in the world I am going to finish my internship and start my two contract jobs, I am just too tired right now to give my well-earned graduation the hoo-rah it needs.  Not to mention that I just finished my last semester of grad school.

I wonder if any other graduates feel this way.  Really, I can't wait for tomorrow to be over.  This is one chapter in my life I can't wait to put behind me.  Grateful I did it?  Yes.  Would I do it again?  Maybe.  Ask me again in a few months.

As for now, just put me in a hotel room, away from life for three days and I can guarantee you I will be sleeping.  A LOT.

Balance in the Universe

Our family of three (four, if you count the dog) will be welcoming another boy into the family this Fall.  Lance breathed a sigh of relief.  There is balance in the universe.  Or at least a little more balance in our household.  Baby Boy is healthy and growing steadily.  I can't believe we are half-way done!

The Prodigal Dog

I had to have a talk with Sofi today, who ran away.  Luckily, the receptionist at the nearby animal hospital saw our chubby beagle non-chalantly meandering past their office and he pulled her inside and gave us a call.  Our guess is she was looking for Papa Johns, as we often take her with us when we go to pick up a pizza ordered. Her hysterical Mama was never more over-joyed to see her first baby safe and not in the dog pound or worse yet - dead on the side of the road. (The animal hospital is at an intersection of two of the busiest roads in our city.) After I loved her up and gave her lots of kisses and hugs, she was lectured on how good she at it at our house and how she should never, never, never, ever, run away again.  Seriously, Sofi.  You have your own room.  You have a big backyard.  You have a toddler that feeds you tasty morsels every day.  You are lucky to be alive. 

I think she was sorry.

Lance had to have a talk with Elisabeth today, who opened the front door to help Sofi escape. He warned her if she let Sofi out the front door that we may never see Sofi again.  She cried.  And then she went with Lance to help find our dog in her new Cindi-rella dress she got from her WV family.  She kept hollering "Sofi" in her scratchy, two-year old voice, in hopes Sofi would come back. 

I know she was sorry.  She told her Papa so.

Oh, the adventures we have.  I wonder how our next baby will fit into the mix.

Relief.

I am officially done with the MSIDT program at Cal State Fullerton and in a week from Saturday, I will have a Masters of Science degree in Instructional Design and Technology.

Relief.  That is the only word I can find to describe how we ALL feel in this house.  RELIEF.

Now, let the celebrating begin.

(Elisabeth reading my Dreamweaver book.  Besides having an absentee mom, she got to learn about website design these past few months.)

It'll All Be Over Soon

Ever see Titanic?  If you did, remember the line a panicked mom whispers to her toddler as she stands on the deck as the ship is about to sink into the ocean?

"It'll all be over soon."

That is what I keep telling myself every day, feeling something a little similar to what the mother meant.  No, I am NOT dying. Nor do I mean to compare graduate school to a tragic death.  But it is painful.  And somewhat of a nightmare.  It is more overwhelming than I can imagine. And so stressful that I can't wait to see the end of it.

29 days until my grad project must be completed and brought to the bindery at CSFU. 29 days until I am done with post-bac school forever. 29 days until I can breathe again.  29 days until my home can have some semblance of order and I can stop resorting to having my baby watching Disney movies.  Though I have to admit, Lady in the Tramp is quite a good flick.  Don't you think?

29 days.

***********************************
Post script:  I guess I come across as complaining a lot.  Let me just recap the following two weeks so you can understand why my simple task of completing a grad school project has helped turn my life into a nightmare.

• Horrible facial pain over Easter weekend that required constant icing of the face.
• Two hours spent in Urgent Care on Monday, after finding out my regular doc was on vacation.  I was prescribed an antibiotic.
• Facial and tooth pain that got increasingly worse throughout the day on Monday.  Enough that I called my dentist who told me it probably wasn't related to my teeth and more likely my sinuses.
• Awake all night Monday with the worst pain I have ever experienced in life.  Much worse than giving birth.  Enough that I asked Lance to either a) take me to the emergency room or b) knock me out with a bat.  He did not do either, worried it would have a negative effect on my baby.
• Almost passing out from pain while driving to the endodontist Tuesday morning. The Spirit whispered "Pull over now."  I did.  SCARY.
• Receiving a root canal that took THREE hours to complete due to the insane infection in my tooth.
• Finding out it takes 5 visits to the dentist to receive a permanent crown.  FIVE.
• Also discovering I have to get another night guard once my crown is in place. AND my dental insurance has run out for 2010.
• Realizing that my root canal and my crown will cost us $1000.  Good bye post-graduation cruise, my monthly house cleaner, and my babysitter for Elisabeth.  We just can't afford you.
• Recently diagnosed with a UTI and blood pressure that keeps creeping up higher and higher.  Go figure.  My poor pregnant body can not handle all of this stress.  

The good news:  Novocain is God's nectar.  I almost kissed my endodontist when he took all of my pain away.  I started pre-natal yoga up again. Elisabeth is starting to talk in sentences. Lance has taken over doing the dishes. I get to go away for a weekend to scrapbook with my friends in April. Harry Potter #7 is supposed to come out in November. AND only 29 more days.  

I know this is what you all really want to see.  This is Elisabeth helping me make rice crispy treats. She and I have matching aprons.

Dear Mr. President

Dear Mr. President:

Can you please make sure that you raise federal taxes for all of your new programs you are funding?  And make sure you use our tax money to bail out those affected by the mortgage crisis. Because between what we pay the federal government and what we pay our state, we currently only have to pay about 30% of our annual income to the powers that be.  And really - I don't think that is enough.  I mean, what do we need 30% of our income for?  Maybe so we can someday purchase a house?  But in the time being, please, use our money to pay for someone else's.

Sincerely,
Kristi